Sally's World

You will not believe what happened to us the other day...actually...sadly, you probably will. We were not allowed in a shop because Deion may have broken something while in his wheelchair...apparently, kids in electric chairs are NOT ALLOWED. Pushable ones, and buggies are okay, but electric chairs are too much of a risk in the breakable goods department.

Okay,I'll tell you what I wanted to break, and it wasn't anything they were selling in the shop!!!

"So let me get this straight?" I asked in something just below roar level! "Disabled people are not allowed in your store."

"Oh yes, of course they are," said 'thick as shit' store assistant, "just not kids in electric chairs!"

Well,I don't need to go on about the small argument that ensued, and there's certainly no need to repeat any of the threats made (who me?)...

But the manager was called, we were assured that it IS NOT store policy to keep out electric chairs, and the 'thick as shit' assistant got it wrong. Apologies were made, I resisted the urge to tell Deion to drive around at top speed like demolition derby and break everything he could (very understanding of us I think!)

And I know what will happen next, we'll get a letter of apology from head office and some store vouchers, I know this, because it happened once before in another store. I don't want the bloody store vouchers, I want to be able to go shopping with my son and not be turned away because he's in a wheelchair...simple...you'd think! The vouchers will be rolled up and returned with a suggestion of where they should put them!

Okay, I know we are moving ahead, and things are improving...but come on...can we get there a bit quicker please, people are being treated like second/third class citizens here! GGRRRRR!

One things for sure, the rule book goes out of the window when you have a child with special needs.

It amazes me how different things are. When Jordan and Robyn went to secondary school it was easy really, so we traipsed round all the schools in our catchment area, weighed up all the pros and cons, talked to teachers, pupils, analysed the exam results… essentially it was pretty simple, and they’ve been very happy with the choices we all made…

So obviously with Deion, we got embroiled in a big fight about which school, because somehow the education department thought that having special needs meant you didn’t have as much right to choose, but we got our own way in the end…then there was the fight to get suitable toileting facilities, anyone would think I was asking for a space rocket, not simply suitable toileting facilities…I’d probably have more have more luck and less fuss getting my hands on a bloody space rocket….note to self, ring NASA!!!

Next came transport…think we’re almost there on that point…the school are being great and we are ironing out any other issues…relatively small regarding what happens in a fire drill, desk heights, classroom organisation, low coat hooks, games and PE…..all surmountable issues…

But here comes the bit I don’t get, the thing I fear we’ll never alter, and that’s ignorance. Now, when JJ and Robyn went off to secondary school, not a single person ever asked me if they would be taking exams when they left school…the question of them leaving with a decent education went without saying…it is expected no???

So explain to me why someone would ask me (with a scoff of derision no less) if I thought Deion would really get any GCSE’s.

I get Deion is different... $h!t, Deion gets he’s different…but since when did different mean stupid????

As parents, when your child has a disability, yes, you adjust your goals and expectations if you like…it’s not the first steps you crave, it’s a new electric wheelchair so that he can drive himself. Okay, its not football, but wheelchair basketball, we’ve been told the likelihood is that Deion wont be able to have children of his own…so we might look forward to the day he fosters or adopts a child, he may chose not to have children.

But we are blessed, and Deion has merely physical limitations, not academic ones…hence the fact he can attend a mainstream school, hence the fact he is so bright its scary, has a sarcastic/cheeky/okay, if I’m honest an evil streak to rival Dennis the Menace….why would we think he wont be taking exams…don’t all kids in mainstream school take exams…is it not what is expected????

So to the woman…who I am also sending this post to also, who works with children in special education, who is supposed to be helping and supporting us…quite frankly up yours!!! Is your child taking exams…what’s that?...no kids, oh, could have guessed that…you probably couldn’t raise a cat! I’m sure when Deion graduates from University…you’ll still be sat behind that desk, not having a clue about real life…

Deion knows he can do whatever he wants in life…the people that know and love him spend a lot of time and energy making sure he knows he has no limitations in life…so when someone, who should quite frankly know better, comes along and has the ability to undo all that work in one sentence…it makes me so mad I could spit…

Needless to say, we wont be having anything to do with this person in future…after all, I would like to see Deion graduate from college, instead of serving a prison sentence for murder!!!

And just for the record, that’s not a threat, I’m merely venting my anger and frustration at your incompetence, ignorance and stupidity!

I know I have spoken about this lady before, but it is still getting quite a bit of coverage, people are still talking about her, and I am shocked at the amount of parents who think her disability will scare their children...openly admitting ignorance if you ask me...

On Cbeebies there is a new presenter, she’s a pretty girl, bubbly, good at her job, but dare I say it…she has a disability, she only has one hand. I have to say, I didn’t even notice at first, and I expect most kids didn’t…but parents actually started making complaints, hundreds of them flooded in apparently.

What a joke!

Some insensitive 'idiot' (for want of a better word) actually said… "Is it just me, or does anyone else think the new woman presenter on Cbeebies (Cerrie Burnell) may scare the kids because of her disability?

"I didn't want to let my children watch the filler bits on the bedtime hour last night because I know it would have played on my eldest daughter's mind and possibly caused sleep problems... and yes, this is a serious post."

Amazing! and sadly..no, it wasn't just him!

I truly cannot believe that so many people would discriminate so freely, perhaps if he was more sensitive, his kids would be too. Kids really don’t care about disabilities, until they are taught to do so, they may be curious, which is natural, but scared…I doubt it very much???

Other people accused the BBC of employing her to score points, actually accused the BBC of positive discrimination can someone explain this term to me please?

Cerrie Burnell rose above it, and even though she was said to be disappointed by the criticism she still welcomed the discussion…

"It can only be a good thing that parents are using me as a chance to talk disability with their children," she said. "It just goes to show how important it is to have positive disabled role models on CBeebies and television in general."

Good for her.

This young lady has a child herself, is her child going to grow up frightened…NO! Because her child will be brought up in a household where differences make no difference to what a person can achieve.

Here, see her for yourself, and you tell me...is she scary? intimidating???

Well, Deion’s day just went from bad to worse yesterday…..his class had extra study after school, which is bad enough, but afterwards, he came out of school, and caught his foot on a wall to the left as he steered his chair right..his foot bent at a rather unnatural angle and he immediately moaned of pain. I took off the shoe…big mistake, the foot and ankle swelled and turned purple before my eyes and I loaded him into the car and went straight to accident and emergency department.

I have to say, of all my children, it’s not the one in the wheelchair you think you’ll be rushing off to A & E with a sprained ankle…

Okay, by now it was four thirty, and there was no-where to park, of course, we were caught in the ‘after school injury rush hour.’

Our local hospital hasn’t got brilliant parking, and there are only four disabled spaces…not nearly enough, especially as two of them were coned off and dug up, and the other two had cars without disabled badges parked in them…so I had no choice but to squeeze my oversized disabled vehicle into a normal car space…I hate having to do this, as it doesn’t leave much space for my parking neighbours… I invariably end up with a dented door, and also I have to pay, regardless of badge, as only disabled bays are free….and the parking cost almost warrants a bloody remortgage…

So off we go, get booked in, wait for three and a half hours for a doctor to take a look and say “Mmmmm yes it IS rather swollen”….I resisted the urge to yell ‘no shit Sherlock’ and smiled and asked what to do next….x-ray.

Okay, x-ray department fairly quiet, a mere hour wait….back to the doc…no-where to be seen….find him after storming through corridors yelling ‘helloooo, Dr ***** where are you?’ he sighs and goes off in search of x-rays, announces there is no break, but after examining offending ankle, he announces Deion has a bad sprain and a torn ligament, so… compression bandage, elevation, ice and heat, 2 days off school…thank you and goodbye….er hello, bandage…’oh right, there you go’ says Dr ***** and hands me the bandage….

Okay, I have 4 kids and some experience…but really???

No nurses were available, so I asked how tight, how high up the ankle and he watched me do it….it didn’t occur to me until we left that if he had time to instruct me, he could have bloody well done it…

We were just glad to be getting out of there. So we went back to the van that I had to park about three miles away at the other end of the hospital….

And best bit of all…there was a note on my windshield…. Note says….”you should not have parked your vehicle here; it didn’t give me much space to get in my car, kindly park with more thought and consideration in future.”

Loaded Deion in the car, made sure all doors and windows were shut…and moved a few paces away so he couldn’t hear the expletives coming from my mouth…didn’t realise man passing by until he took my arm (probably to escort me to psych ward) and asked if I was okay….red faced, I pointed to note and car…he used a few expletives of his own…glad to have someone on my side, so felt calmer, got in car and drove home.

So now have 2 days at home being a slave to youngest son….still feeling very angry with note man…thinking of putting an ad in local paper, demanding he come forward, then can stick said note right up his arse….actually I probably wouldn’t… but I’d bloody well make him eat it…

As if it is my choice to drive huge oversized disabled vehicle and I am responsible for total lack of disable parking in the whole of London!!!!

Aaarrgghhh!

Deion had a dentist appointment today, sad child that he is he was actually looking forward to it…he says the drill sounds like a car in his mouth…

Anyway...

It was busy as usual, so we sat to wait and Deion was showing me something fascinating about a power ranger in his magazine…a lady came in dressed in a suit, with a briefcase and no child, so I’m guessing she was there in a professional capacity.

The only spare chair was opposite Deion, so she sat down…and proceeded to very deliberately NOT stare at Deion. I find this even weirder than the staring thing. So okay, Deion is in a wheelchair, he dribbles sometimes, but really, he just looks like the average child.

Deion of course is fine with the staring, he says that people only stare at him because he is so good looking, because that’s what we all tell him.

This lady was looking everywhere but at him, the poster above Deion's head was apparently fascinating, as was the floor by his feet, and the spot just to his left equally hard for her to tear her eyes from!

It was very obvious what she was doing…but hey, we don’t care about this sort of thing, we've got used to it and ignore it pretty much.

Deion was telling me a story by now in his own special way, he sort of gets all excited when he retells something he find interesting, and jiggles around and was laughing more than he was talking, so his magazine fell off of his lap and on to the floor.

To our surprise, the lady opposite then yelled, “YOU’VE. DROPPED. YOUR .MAGAZINE.” In a very slow voice.

The waiting room went quiet.

“THANKS. BUT. YOU. DON’T. NEED. TO. SHOUT.” Deion said back equally loudly and slowly.

This amused me and most of the other parents in the waiting room.

“SORRY. I. DIDN’T. REALISE. I. SHOUTED.” She yelled back!

Then she passed Deion his magazine back.

“THANK. YOU. VERY. MUCH.” Said Deion in the same loud, slow voice.

The lady walked away then and Deion turned and said to me and said “I had to to talk to her like that mum, I think she has special needs.”

Well, this got me laughing, and the mum sitting next to me almost fell off her chair.

The thing is, it wasn’t anything malicious on that ladies part, and it happens all the time, people talk over children with special needs and disabilities presuming of course that they don’t understand. Or yell and talk slowly, thinking they are not going to understand.

But I can’t help feeling as though people should know better.

Well, Deion wasn’t worse of for the encounter, and was perfectly happy one the dentist had driven her special car in his mouth, and he went back to school to show off his special sticker!

Have a great day; I’ll be chuckling about that for the rest of the day I think!

Sal xxx

I’ve heard it all now, I already knew that there were many ignorant people out there, but this takes the biscuit.

On Cbeebies there is a new presenter, she’s a pretty girl, bubbly, good at her job, but dare I say it…she has a disability, she only has one hand. I have to say, I didn’t even notice at first, and I expect most kids didn’t…but parents actually started making complaints, hundreds of them flooded in apparently.

What a joke!

Some insensitive 'idiot' (for want of a better word) actually said… "Is it just me, or does anyone else think the new woman presenter on Cbeebies (Cerrie Burnell) may scare the kids because of her disability?

"I didn't want to let my children watch the filler bits on the bedtime hour last night because I know it would have played on my eldest daughter's mind and possibly caused sleep problems... and yes, this is a serious post."

Amazing! and sadly..no, it wasn't just him!

I truly cannot believe that so many people would discriminate so freely, perhaps if he was more sensitive, his kids would be too. Kids really don’t care about disabilities, until they are taught to do so, they may be curious, which is natural, but scared…I doubt it very much???

Other people accused the BBC of employing her to score points, actually accused the BBC of positive discrimination can someone explain this term to me please?

Cerrie Burnell rose above it, and even though she was said to be disappointed by the criticism she still welcomed the discussion…

"It can only be a good thing that parents are using me as a chance to talk disability with their children," she said.

"It just goes to show how important it is to have positive disabled role models on CBeebies and television in general."

Good for her.

This young lady has a child herself, is her child going to grow up frightened…NO! Because her child will be brought up in a household where differences make no difference to what a person can achieve.

To read the full report go to http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Disabled-CBeebies-TV-Presenter-Cerrie-Burnell-Accused-Of-Scaring-Children-After-Complaints/Article/200902415227818?lpos=UK_News_Third_UK_News_Article_Teaser_Region__0&lid=ARTICLE_15227818_Disabled_CBeebies_TV_Presenter_Cerrie_Burnell_Accused_Of_Scaring_Children_After_Complaints_

Back again so soon!

I know this is something that many of you will understand. The pure frustration of people parking unnecessarily in disabled spaces, just so they don't have too far to walk...well it is cold out I guess, bless...

But the word 'frustration' didn't come close to the ignorance I experienced last night. I was simply picking Jordan and Robyn up from karate...(let me get a little boast in here very quickly, they have been going to karate for 5 years, have really committed to it and got their black belts a few months ago)...So there I was innocently picking my Little ninjas up, I pulled into the car park, which had lots of empty spaces in case your wondering. But the wholly inadequate row of disabled parking spaces was completely filled with tiny sports cars and the odd Ford Mondeo.

I had no choice but to pull in front of two of them to wait for the kids, I got out of the car so they could see me (I couldn't actually go in and get them as I couldn't park). I know I said there were other spaces, but seeing as I drive a big green bus with roughly the same dimensions of a Sherpa tank, an ordinary space is no good to me.

All would have been well, if the owner of one of the cars hadn't come out and raised his voice at me...I kid you not! He actually shouted at me for blocking him in...he even bandied the B word about....and as anyone who knows me will tell you...it's NOT my favourite word.

I stayed calm, after all Deion was in the car and the kids would be out any minute, I calmly told him to shut up. Okay, so I may have mentioned the incredible level of his ignorance, also his total lack of intelligence and brain cells, his inconsideration and general rudeness and idiocy might have been mentioned ...but I was calm as I insulted...sorry, I mean as I stood up for myself.

He yelled again, added the F word this time, and I was getting angry by now. "I'm so sorry," I said loudly, "was my big disabled vehicle stopping you from getting your little, clearly non disabled vehicle out of the DISABLED ONLY parking bay."

Goodness me, all he'd had to do was come out and politely ask me to move the bloody van, apologise even for parking there, was that really too much to ask? Then came a whole other level of ignorance..."but you're not disabled," he snapped looking me up and down. "No, I'm not disabled," I replied through gritted teeth. Not something he'd be able to say ever again if he threw the B word out there again.

Well, I calmly got back in the car, the kids came out from their karate lesson, they also jumped in the car and off we went. They were none the wiser and I was just spitting mad. Mostly that I hadn't got to run the bastard over!

Why do people do this? how on earth can someone take one of these spaces that are so important, and not only that, actually be so rude and ignorant when someone who genuinely needed the space comes along. Not an ounce of shame. Its a measure of our society in a way, and one of the things that need to be tackled head on.

It's not the first time this sort of thing has happened to me, it certainly wont be the last, and I'd put money on anyone with a disabled badge having gone through the same thing at least once.

Lets hope that in the future all car parks will provide better parking, that people will show more consideration and less ignorance...oh and while we're asking the impossible, lets end world hunger and solve the issues of world peace.

See you later

Sal x