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Why we love British Newspapers!
Thursday, 21 May 2009
Here are some real news stories...they certainly made me laugh!!!Commenting on a complaint from a Mr. Arthur Purdey about a large gas bill, a spokesman for North West Gas said, 'We agree it was rather high for the time of year. It's possible Mr. Purdey has been charged for the gas used up during the explosion that destroyed his house.' (The Daily Telegraph)
Police reveal that a woman arrested for shoplifting had a whole salami in her underwear. When asked why, she said it was because she was missing her Italian boyfriend.(The Manchester Evening News)
Irish police are being handicapped in a search for a stolen van, because they cannot issue a description. It's a Special Branch vehicle and they don't want the public to know what it looks like.(The Guardian)
A young girl who was blown out to sea on a set of inflatable teeth was rescued by a man on an inflatable lobster. A coast guard spokesman commented, 'This sort of thing is all too common'.(The Times)
At the height of the gale, the harbourmaster radioed a coast guard and asked him to estimate the wind speed. He replied he was sorry, but he didn't have a gauge. However, if it was any help, the wind had just blown his Land Rover off the cliff.. ( Aberdeen Evening Express)
Mrs. Irene Graham of Thorpe Avenue , Boscombe, delighted the audience with her reminiscence of the German prisoner of war who was sent each week to do her garden. He was repatriated at the end of 1945, she recalled -'He'd always seemed a nice friendly chap, but when the crocuses came up in the middle of our lawn in February 1946, they spelt out 'Heil Hitler.'' ( Bournemouth Evening Echo)
21 May 2009 at 10:49
oh, they are GOOD sally- very funny indeed- and btw- good luck with the jury duty......yuck xx
21 May 2009 at 13:00
Are you finding time to read the newspaper during jury duty? If so, I am glad because these made both my husband and me to have a good laugh this morning.
Good luck on the jury!
21 May 2009 at 14:17
If our papers were that interesting, I might read them more often!!
21 May 2009 at 15:24
There. My laugh for the day. Thanks.
21 May 2009 at 15:33
Those are too funny. Being a journalism major I always love to read this kind of stuff. Thanks for sharing!
21 May 2009 at 15:55
Hysterical! I especially loved the one about the inflatable teeth and inflatable lobster being all too common. Ha!
21 May 2009 at 15:58
oh man!! that second one just about had me rollin' on the floor laughin!! loved these!
21 May 2009 at 17:15
lol My favorite one is the one about the wind blowing the car off the cliff. I love a good smart ass comeback!
21 May 2009 at 17:46
Hi Sal,
Rather you than me my friend!What a responsibility, but some one has to do it and you ,of all people,will give an impartial opinion etc .The worst bit is being unable to discuss etc isn't it ,so just do your bit as only you could my friend.You may feel isolated for a little while ,but being married to a barrister will give you more insight than most into how these things work.Hang on in there but try and get some sleep.If you feel a bit low just look at the email I forwarded re Barbie being 50 to make you smile!!
Much love to you all Wendy xxxxxx
21 May 2009 at 17:54
This is good stuff and I thought the British were all about stiff upper lips.
21 May 2009 at 18:25
LOL...thats a completely unfounded rumour...
21 May 2009 at 23:51
I never read anything that good in our local papers. Inflatable teeth? Didn't know there was such a thing. lol!
22 May 2009 at 16:52
I've been missing out! Our newspapers are never that interesting!
26 May 2009 at 22:40
OMG too funny, those are crazy.