seeing as i'm in court this week!!!  

Tuesday, 26 May 2009

If only I had a case like this....

Little Old Lady in court......

Defence Attorney:
Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady:I am 86 years old.

Defence Attorney:Will you tell us, in your own Words, what happened the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady:There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front Porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the Porch and sat down beside me.

Defence Attorney:Did you know him?

Little Old Lady:No, but he sure was friendly.

Defence Attorney:What happened after he sat down?

Little Old Lady:He started to rub my thigh.

Defence Attorney:Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady:No, I didn't stop him.

Defence Attorney:Why not?

Little Old Lady:It felt good.Nobody had done that since my Albert died some 30 years ago.

Defence Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Lady:He began to rub my breasts.Defence Attorney:Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady:No, I did not stop him.

Defence Attorney:Why not?

Little Old Lady:His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited.I haven't felt that good in years!

Defence Attorney:What happened next?

Little Old Lady:Well, by then, I was feeling really 'spicy' that I just laid down and told him'Take me, young man. Take me!'

Defence Attorney:Did he take you?

Little Old Lady:Hell, no! He just yelled,'April Fool!' And that's when I shot him, the little bastard.

And I certainly wouldn't convict her!!!

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