Friday, 4 December 2009
It is now Dec, and like the last three Decembers I am getting nervous.
It used to be that December was my favourite month of all time, I became a mum on December the 5th, my birthday is the 11th and then of course there's Christmas.
We're big on Christmas, Aaron and I shared a love of all things tacky, if it jiggled, sang, glittered, we had to have it.
So now, I dread December, I don't get to celebrate Aarons birthday, not in the same way, so thinking about enjoying my own birthday a few days later falls flat, and Christmas is not the same without my Aaron.
I make sure we celebrate, and I do smile and love to see the kids faces light up, my fear is that I'm just going through the motions...or is that, in fact what I have to do until it comes naturally.