Sally's World

LABELS???

2010-12-22T14:05:00.001Z

Home at last

2010-10-19T18:50:00.000+01:00

Deion is back home and in considerable better shape than me. He woke up after a pretty rough time feeling okay, and lets be honest, pretty high on drugs. I think that the hospital should give us parents some of those drugs while we are bedside waiting for good news...it certainly would have saved me about three heart attacks, a stroke and half a head of hair!!!

The operation did not go as smoothly as we all hoped, Deions tummy was in a funny place apparently, so they had to open him up and do the gastro externally. He was only supposed to be in theatre for an hour and a half, and I was climbing the walls after two, then the surgeon rang from theatre to say they needed to cut him open and it was still another five hours before I could get my hands on him.

They kept him pretty high on morphine for a couple of days, so he doesn't remember much about the first two days luckily, I'm more pleased about that than anything because it was pretty rough going, poor little guy.

Of course all that matters is that it was done in the safest way and the outcome is what we wanted.

He has an extra scar and a few extra stitches, but once they stop being sore, they will be a war wound for him to boast about I'm sure.

Once he started to feel better, he bounced back pretty quickly, The special milkshake is going in his special tube and he is tolerating it well. he is so glad to be home, we both are.

We should get the results of the muscle biopsy in a few days, and probably a good thing... I'm too exhausted to be stressed about the results right now. All that matters is, Deion is smiling again and it is wonderful to see his handsome face without the NG tube taped to it.

Deion is now well nourished, getting a proper little chubster and although we are having a few teething problems with the tube site, its still worth it. Life is slowly getting back on an even keel!

Thank you for all you lovely wishes and get well messages.

T-Shirts - Heaven's Special Child

2010-09-11T13:45:00.000+01:00

Okay, so a lot of people have been asking me about the T-shirts, and most of the comments have been fantastic, however, there were two people who asked me if by putting slogans on the shirts, it is setting our kids apart. Sorry to burst your bubble, but as much as it shouldn't be the case, it's the wheelchair that sets them apart. The slogans are just a great way of making people realise, that you don't get to stare and be derogatory, just because our kids are different.

If most kids and adults were stared at or teased, they would be able to have their say, not everyone can do that. And as a parent or carer, it would be easy to get involved in fights on a daily basis about this. So instead, the slogans get the message across without having to get into a confrontation. Many kids are gaining confidence from wearing them. 100% of the time, they stop people staring, or actually make them realise they were staring in the first place.

So far the comments from kids and parents wearing the shirts have been amazing. They are raising awareness, making people realise that 'it's rude to stare', that even if a child can't tell you, they notice if you are being derogatory. And remember, they aren't just for kids, one of our best sellers is actually a bright pink hoodie saying 'wheelchair babe', and the majority of them are sold to elderly ladies in wheelchairs...fantastic. Of course a few elderly gentlemen have caught on and sales of 'chicks dig the chair' in adult sizes are on the rise. Hmmm!

A couple of people also asked if they have special fastenings for easy fitting. All I can say is, that we don't dress differently just because we know we are going to be sitting down all day, so we don't provide those for kids just because they are going to be sitting own all day. These types of clothes, would set them apart in a less positive way. What we want are ordinary, affordable clothes in ordinary colours, just with great slogans to reflect their personalities. I know that specialist clothing may be more necessary as people get older, adn its personal choice, but its not something my son would want. He wants trendy jeans just like his friends.

My son's favourite slogan is 'my other wheelchairs a porsche', not only does it make people smile, but it makes them realise that he isn't insecure about his disability. He has no choice but to embrace it, and he thinks everyone else should too.

I hope this answers your questions, if not then let me know.

Sal x

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Copyright © 2006 Sally-Anne Stephenson. All rights reserved.

Bramble in Whitehorse Meadow.

2010-08-27T10:53:00.001+01:00

I really like this photo of this bramble. Its been raining in London pretty much everyday this week. This was taken after a rain shower and its still wet (not the rain drops).

COMMON SENSE AND COURTESY APPLIES . . .Unless credited otherwise, all photos and poetry in this blog are original work protected by international intellectual property and copyright laws. Please ask for permission if you wish to use something.

countdown

2010-07-05T20:19:00.002+01:00

Okay, so its now 2 days until Deion goes into hospital for his operation for his gastro tube and his muscle biopsy...he is unfazed, I am a nervous wreck.

The few weeks with the NG tube haven't been as bad as I thought, and like everything else that comes along, its just slotted into Deions life, all of our lives.

I got myself in a bit of a state, so ended up with everything from migraines to ear infections in the fallout.

I know its a basic procedure, I know they do thousands a year...yep, heard it all, "he'll be fine, don't worry"... I get it, I would be saying the same thing to anyone else, problem is, I do worry, its in our make-up as parents, it's mandatory. I hate it, I hate that moment when they put the mask over his face and put him to sleep and tell me I have to leave him with them. His Little eyes looking lost and bewildered as he goes under....I actually have nightmares about it.

Okay, I know Dee is as tough as nails really, he will be fine and they will make sure he's pretty much pain free, and as soon as they call the ward and tell me I can go down to recovery, I'll be fine...the three hours of pacing, biting my nails, pulling my hair out and snapping at anyone in a ten foot radius will be forgotten ...and the second I get to him and see the recognition in his eyes and his arms reaching out for me...I'll relax.

Until then, I will be the bitch from hell, I have turned into a dictator indoors, the clothes are ironed, the meals prepared and frozen, the house spring cleaned,Lists are made... because of course, I refuse to admit that the three adults left in the house would be able to cope and would not actually starve and be forced to wear wrinkled unkempt clothes, without my superior organisational skills...but hey, its how I cope!

I guess it's to do with the fact that ultimately, I have made the decision, and I know I have made it for the right reasons, but if anything goes wrong, if he's in pain, if he hates the tube...guess who I'll blame?

The biopsy results are gonna be hard to wait for, We more than anyone know how life altering those moments the results are read out can be. I'll try not to panic, or dwell or preempt, I can promise to put it out of my mind and not worry until there is something to worry about, but my pants would just burst into flames as it would be a big fat lie...

But one thing at a time.

We will be in for a week then at home for a week, and Deion is strangely looking forward to it and knows he is going to be able to run me ragged, that I will be unable to say no to him for anything...if I so much as hesitate, he will bat those big brown eyes at me and even though I know i'll have been played for a fool...I'll do what he wants anyway!

So wish us luck, I will let you know how he gets on xxxx

caring kids

2010-06-07T21:23:00.001+01:00

I just wanted to say, that there are times when kids get a bad press, but on the whole, the way kids care, really warms my heart.

When Deion came out of hospital with his NG tube, he was really worried about how the other kids would react if he went back to school. Its not like you can hide it. And I have to say, we held our breath that first day back, after all, we are talking about kids who don't have much experience with special needs on the whole, so it would be new for them too.

Well, Deion was asked questions at first, which he answered, and no-one seemed all that bothered or treated him differently as far as he was concerned, but Deions key worker spoke to me at the end of the day and he was surprised at the sheer number of kids who came up to him and just wanted to know that a) Dee was okay and b) the tube didn't hurt him.

It goes to show that having kids with special needs in mainstream school, works, and works well, not just for the child, but it promotes a caring attitude in other kids too. The teachers I've spoken to have noticed a change in the pupils attitude since Deion started too. It makes me proud now that we fought so hard to get him there.

Whose child is this!

2010-06-04T10:07:00.000+01:00

Now, I think I may have mentioned how bright Jordan is, he picks things up easily and retains them. Of course this is why he just passed a ton of exams with top grades, and why he takes an extra advanced maths class (just for fun!)

I do sometimes wonder where he gets it from, but I am just glad he has the ability.

But even I was surprised when he announced that he wanted to learn Japanese...okay, so I got him the books and CD's he asked for, but on flicking through and realising there are about 10 different alphabets and about 2000 characters, I was less than optimistic...

Well, just a few weeks later, Jordan has memorised most of the alphabet, knows dozens of phrases, has learnt what alphabet is applied where and can read quite a few phrases as well.

I am very impressed, of course Jordan thought maybe a trip to Japan to try it out was in order...nice try J, a trip to the nearest Sushi bar will have to do!

fire

2010-06-02T03:08:00.001+01:00

Gosh, I'm glad to have found another minute so soon. I have just got in from work and thought I'd click on quickly.

A weird night at work tonight.... I got called to a police station for a kid accused of arson, accused of burning down a house (a vacant one luckily). Now, just because he was caught running away nearby and is known to police doesn't mean he's guilty right, so I went with an open mind.

Of course, the kid denied everything in interview, and I really tried to stay impartial, but the truth is his hair was all but smoking....seriously, the kid stunk of burning rubber and god knows what else...so, my advice, if you're sitting in an interview with soot stained fingers, reeking of burning building, and have your eyebrows singed off....then maybe it's not the best idea to tell the interviewing officer that you have not been near a fire, set a fire or know anything about a fire!!!!

Mad Mad World

2010-05-31T19:18:00.002+01:00

Wow, Hi everyone,its been a long time. There has been so much going on, I don't know where to start.

Home life/work/family...all totally crazy, and although that's nothing new, it has been getting on top of me more than usual. Six more hours in the day needed here!!!

Deions been in and out of hospital quite a bit, had a few bugs and chest infections. He has a nasal gastric tube now so he can have special calorie laden milkshakes right into his tummy. the swallowing got so hard for him that he just couldn't stay well, so we have this tube temporarily until his has the operation to give him his gastreostomy on the 17th June. I've forgotten how much is involved, all the ordering of the supplies (from four different places) the tubes, syringes and pumps...wow, but its all come flooding back.

The botox in his legs didn't make all that much difference,despite three hours of stretches a day! so he has to have the operation on them, but that's a few months down the line, and we have been having hydro therapy every week to help with the pain and movement...then a few months after that, he's having an operation to reroute how his bladder works, which is a positive thing because he'll have more Independence.

He is having his muscle biopsy the same day as his gastro in a couple of weeks to save an extra anaesthetic. We have made the very hard decision, that if the biopsy shows nothing, we are going to draw a line under it, as it were, no more tests, it will become an obsession, and we still have to live and be happy. Nothing is going to change Deions personality, its too big for that LOL! but I don't want his whole life to be about finding out whats wrong instead of living. And quite simply, there aren't always answers.

The other kids are great, Robyn just finished work experience, and I felt very old as she left in her grown up office clothes every day...Her and Jordan are both in the middle of exams now and are not stressed at all, which is not how I remember my exams being, we're having no tantrums, no all nighters, no ripping the hair out and throwing text books out the bedroom window...weird!!!

Better go, sorry, no time for frills or pictures, I will be back soon, I promise, I have some hilarious work stories and lots of news on other stuff, I hope you are all well, miss you all.

Sal xxxxxx

remember me???

2010-02-03T09:24:00.002Z

Hello, remember me? I'm that person that used to blog every day, catch up with all your blogs and offer some sort of support (I hope).

For the first time in what seems like forever, I have accosted Dave's computer and have a few moments to catch up and let you know whats going on in our insane lives...

I'm working ridiculous night-time hours, which seems ideal for an insomniac...but I'm not sure when I am supposed to catch up.

Deion is finally getting his botox in his thigh muscles, this should ease the pain until his operation to put his knee caps back down in the right place... where the thigh muscles are tight, all the exercises he has to do are pulling the kneecaps up, rather than stretching the thigh muscle...ouch!

Deion has had some special tests to see how the swallowing is going, his swallow is now unsafe with bread/cakes, anything of that consistency as the tongue is not holding his food in his mouth, so it slips down and he aspirates...hence all the chest infections.

Also plain fluid goes down too fast with the same results...so he has to have thickened drinks.

The doctors are talking about giving him a gastosteomy feeding tube so he can have enough fluid and calories safely...although this terrifies me because its all a bit "de-ja-vu" I am obviously happy to do whats best for Deion. Deion however is refusing, because the only person he knew with a gastro tube was Aaron and no matter how much we are trying to reassure him its different, he is scared. He also, very intelligently pointed out that we wouldn't tell him if he had an illness like Aaron's anyway...which is probably true, not sure how to reassure him really, and that kills me.

We get Deion's neurology results on the 10th Feb...so wish us luck.

I am feeling a little under appreciated to be honest, this may seem selfish and shallow compared to Deions dilemmas... I wonder why everything I do goes unnoticed, yet I am supposed to celebrate everyone elses achievements with gusto... I don't really know how to keep up with all the housework, cooking, cleaning, appointments and work these stupid late night hours. Of course, everyone still expects dinner on the table, dry cleaning collected, food in the cupboards and ironed clothes!!!!

Maybe I can arrange for the fairies to come in and do it while everyone is asleep...well, everyone except me of course, because I shall either be sitting in a police station somewhere asking a twelve year old why he thinks its okay to be stealing cars at 2 am/thumping his mum/carrying knives/smoking cannabis...or else I'll be trying to catch up with the bloody ironing!!!

Enough about me!!!

Jordan and Robyn have just had a few weeks of intense studying and exams, I think they have come through it relatively unscathed, if somewhat tired....mind you, now they have less study...maybe they can help out more round the house....sorry....just a thought!

Deion had his first secondary school report....8 distinctions, 6 merits...way to go Deion...a total star, that's gonna cost us!!!

We were snowed in for Robyn's parent teacher meeting...but she was so keen for me to see her teacher and be impressed that we trudged about four miles through the snow, met with the teacher for about 5 minutes...because of course he has no worries and thinks Robyn's a star, then we trudged four miles home....tell me again why I couldn't have that conversation on the phone???

Jordan and I seem to be bickering a bit at the moment, I guess its because he is in that in-between stage, he thinks he knows it all and is a grown man at the ripe old age of 16... "I'll be able to drive next year you know mum"... (that'll keep me off the roads anyway!)... and I still think he's my little boy... I must learn how to let go. I just see so much scary stuff out there, its not that easy.

The house is slowly getting sorted, we are 'nearly there' on most things... bit of tiling, bit of painting, a few shelves to put up...we'll get there, I'm just glad to be in and that everyone has their own space.

Okay, I suppose I'd better go, I'm not sure when I shall get a minute to get back on the PC.

Thanks for your e-mails and comments checking I'm OK, I really appreciate it,

Love you all

Sal xxxxx

Charity Wish Foundations

2010-01-22T15:00:00.000Z

I know I have briefly touched on the subject or Wish foundations in past blogs. Something that many people don’t think about or realise, is just how important wish foundations are for families like ours.

I cannot begin to explain to you how hard it is to hear that your child has a terminal illness; I’d say it was like having your heart ripped out, but it’s actually much more painful than that. The world stops spinning, your heart stops beating and you stop breathing as your child’s future is suddenly ripped out from under you. Then you want to punch someone or something, then you deflate like a balloon and try not to let the awful news sink in.

One of the first things you do is think about all the things that you never got to do together, all the things you wanted your child to see and achieve, you think about all the things you wanted to enjoy together. You think about how your other children will miss out on growing up with their sibling and having those memories together.

So this is why wish foundations are more important than I can put into a few paragraphs here. They enable families to go with their child and do something that will make whatever time they have left together special. And not just the child, their siblings and parents also get to experience something wonderful together. That’s something you can’t put a value on.

When we all think of Aaron, one of the first things we think about is the look on his face that first time he saw a dolphin. We have many magical memories, the dolphins, Lapland, Disney, that is what keeps us going now, knowing that we don’t regret not doing it; because we did it…and my goodness did we do it!

We had help from a wish foundation when we were fundraising and it helped create the most precious memories for all of us. There are no words to express that gratitude to the wonderful people that helped.

This is one of the reasons we want to have our own foundation in Aaron’s name. To be able to give other families like ours a chance to have those wonderful memories. We want to be able to give other families hope, hope to keep fighting, hope that their first memories for their child won’t be the illness, the hospitals, the pain, hope that they will have something joyful and precious to hold on to and remember.

It’s not all me, it’s a joint effort with another family and lots of friends and family are going to be involved (through choice or by force!). We are building a web-site now, with the help of an incredible web wizard who is offering his expertise for free…thanks Mark! It’s coming together with lots of information about us, about the dolphins, and about our own experiences. We may still be in our infancy now, but you have to start somewhere. In time we hope to be able to help countless families.

We’ll have an on-line shop selling the t-shirts and baseball caps with Heaven’s Special Child’s extra special slogans. 100% of all profits from the charity shop goes towards helping families realise their dreams of dolphin swims.

So even if you don’t have a child with a life threatening illness, if by some miracle you don’t know a single child with a life threatening illness, you can still make a difference. There are so many wish foundations out there to help and support, go to any of the folowing we sites to show your support.

Dreams come True, http://www.dct.org.uk/

The Starlight Wish Foundation http://www.starlight.org.uk/ ,

Make a Wish foundation http://www.makeawish.org.uk/ and

The HCPT Trust http://www.hcptpilgrimagetrust.org.uk/ to name but a few who are close to our hearts. And it doesn’t even have to be anything big, but by doing what you can, you are making a difference in the lives of families who need that hope and your help.

We all get bogged down with life, we all think we have it hard sometimes, but it is important to not get so wrapped up in what’s going on around you that you can’t see how lucky you are compared to many families. Besides, look at it as an investment, because when you do something good, it makes you feel good, by supporting someone else, you are investing in your own self, because it’s good to do a good thing.

Take care, and do what you can

Sal xxx

blogger gone mad...help!

2010-01-18T11:12:00.002Z

okay, I'm having some problems in blog world, first if I try to open someone elses blog, it opens it over and over again until I shut the computer down, it hasn't let me on my own blog for a few days, and when I got in just now, stuff has moved around in my posts, also there are dozens of 'anonymous' comments that are just lots of japanese writing, often loads on the same post.

I tried to go into the settings and make it so I can no longer accept anonymous comments....it wont let me...help! anyone else had this problem, or know what to do ?

Insomnia

2010-01-15T03:40:00.002Z

Seeing as it's after three o'clock in the morning and everyone else in the house is sound asleep. It seems like a good time to tackle the issue's surrounding insomnia. I have no hope of getting to sleep next to Dave's freight train like snoring anyhow. It wouldn't be so bad if there was something decent on the telly at this time of the morning...there never is, although I am now somewhat of an expert on African and Indian wild life.

Insomnia is something that I have suffered with for so long now, that I don't even think anything of it anymore. And this is a problem I share with several mums and dads I know. It seems to frequently go hand in hand with having special needs kids.

I know exactly why it began; Aaron had sleep disturbance from day one, he never slept more than 2 hours at a time no matter what, so I had to get used to having short bursts of sleep whenever he did. Of course the other children came along and it was no longer possible to do that, and Dave was working full time, so I never expected him to do the waking nights (besides it would have taken a small explosion to wake Dave once asleep) so I just got used to having less sleep.

Although this may be a major factor in my extreme clumsiness of course!I was always, stumbling out of bed, stubbing my toe, tripping down the stairs, and the kids learnt some rather choice words too.

I guess my body just trained itself to adjust, I got into a routine of four hours sleep and that was that. Of course when Aaron became oxygen dependant, he needed someone with him 24 hours a day. He needed suction, percussion physio, and of course he was tube fed, so it was an every minute job. A family support worker we had recently met did come and see us, and was clearly shocked at how shattered I looked ('you look shattered' I believe actually translates to 'good god woman you look rough')and so she arranged for a nurse to come and sit with Aaron three nights a week for six hours at a time.

So that's when I slept...from midnight to six am on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. I was up every minute of every other day. I did doze of a couple of times, once while I was actually standing up doing the ironing would you believe and another time while I was in the middle of changing a nappy (just a wet one luckily). But I got used to it, and I valued those precious hours in bed.

So I guess my insomnia is self inflicted in some ways, and I now find it impossible to sleep normal hours. It's not my brain or my body's fault, I've deprived it of sleep for so long, it's getting it's own back now.

Besides, you don't really want to be in the same room as me if I've had more than four hours sleep, I'm a nightmare, I bounce off the walls and run around like a Tasmanian devil on acid. Dave and the kids joke about not sitting still for to long in case they get dusted, polished, painted or tidied.

But on the other hand, I don't think I'd get everything done if I had to take four hours out of my schedule. I need another three hours in the day as it is! Twenty hour days seem extreme, but I think my life's pretty extreme. There are too many things I want to achieve to spend too much time sleeping I suppose. of course, the odd lay in would be good.

Night night, sleep tight!

Sal x

Multi tasking....

2010-01-08T11:58:00.000Z

Who says men can't do two things at once, they can talk and piss you off at the same time!

three minutes and counting

2010-01-06T11:19:00.002Z

I've managed to jump on the computer for a few minutes...since we've moved the only PC is the one in Dave's office, so I never get on it...my new years resolution (or one of them) is to get my own one sorted and back to blogging.

So i thought a small update....no-one was ill over Xmas, a record for my children, we all ate too much, drank too much and spent too much...the usual...

We are snowed in though, of course they are not complaining.

Work has been mad, I keep getting phone calls at 'stupid o'clock' to go out and see kids who are not deterred from crime even by the minus temperatures...fools. Although the custody sergeants are laughing at me, because when they get bailed/charged and get ready to leave, i keep forgetting to leave my mummy persona at home and tell said kids to stay inside where is warm and ask them where their scarf and gloves are...

The new house is great, of course everything is 'nearly finished' but we'll get there. But if i never see another paint brush, it will be too soon lol!

Deion has a ton of appointments this month, always the way after the Xmas break. I'll let you know how they go. we had a chuckle though as when we went to the wheelchair clinic, they said his back tyres were below the limit and they changed them. Now we keep teasing him about getting pulled over for bald tyres.

Deion will be 12 next week...how did THAT happen...my baby, but its impossible to know what to get right after Xmas.

It was my Mums birthday new years day (I know!!!) we all had a lovely day, we like Mum to know she is loved and treasured.

uh oh, gotta go, Dave's kicking me off the computer already...

Happy new year to you all

Sal xxxxxxxxxx

One word...me????

2009-12-29T17:40:00.000Z

Thank you so much Decadent housewife, its an honour...

In accepting this bloggy award I had to answer a list of questions with one word only.

Here Goes:

1. Where is your cell phone? handbag.

2. Your hair? uurgghhh.

3. Your mother? love.

4. Your father? Warm.

5. Your favourite food? chocolate.

6. Your dream last night? scary.

7. Your favourite drink? cream-soda.

8. Your dream/goal? Happiness.

9. What room are you in? office.

10. Your hobby? Salsa.

11. Your fear? Loneliness.

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Beach.

13. Where were you last night? Working.

14. Something that you aren't? Thin.

15. Muffins? yum.

16. Wish list item? chocolate.

17. Where did you grow up? Kent.

18. Last thing you did? Ate.

19. What are you wearing? Pyjamas.

20. Your TV? Big.

21. Your pets? Cats.

22. Friends? Lifelines.

23. Your life? Hectic.

24. Your mood? Contemplative.

25. Missing someone? Aaron.

26. Vehicle? Blah.

27. Something you're not wearing? A thong.

28. Your favourite store? TK Max.

29. Your favourite colour? Red.

30. When was the last time you laughed? Today.

31. Last time you cried? Today.

32. Your best friend? Me.

33. One place that I go to over and over? Supermarket.

34. One person who emails me regularly? Wendy.

35. Favourite place to eat? Mums.

Okay, that was fun...so I can now pass this along to six more bloggers I regularly visit.

Gloria's Spanish View
Trojan's Corner Wishes You A
Is It Just Me?
Beauty Be Good
Grandma's Page
http://jjinla.blogspot.com/

The Dolphin

2009-12-27T18:13:00.000Z

I've honestly never heard the experience of swimming with dolphins put so eloquently and accurately...love this, made me feel peaceful just reading it.

The Dolphin
by Kate Carr

Have you swum with a friendly dolphin
When the day dawns clear and bright,
And seen his welcoming leap of joy,
As you leave the harbour and pass the buoy?
That's pure delight.
Have you swum with a friendly dolphin,
Dozing under the noonday sun,
and stroked his belly so smooth and strong,
Or felt yourself being towed along
In elfin fun?
Have you swum with a friendly dolphin
In the sunset's fiery glow,
When every wavelet is tinged with gold,
And his silhouette, so huge and bold,
Is a graceful bow?
Have you swum with a friendly dolphin
As the silvery moon rides high,
And ocean and earth are bathed in white,
And the dolphin's aglow with a phosphorous light,
As he glides by?
Have you swum with a friendly dolphin
In the North Sea's rolling swell?
Or a choppy squall, as a cloud passed by,
And a leaden greyness darkened the sky,
And raindrops fell?
Have you swum with a friendly dolphin
And a boatload of friends of a kind?
The harmony linking you all, and him,
As you tumble out of the boat for a swim -
It blows your mind.
Have you swum with a friendly dolphin
And known your panic allayed?
Be it ladders or snorkels - whatever your fear -
Perhaps the oceans depth; once the dolphin's near
You're not afraid.
Yes, I've swum with a friendly dolphin
In the moonlight, the sun and the rain;
And the varying moods of the ocean swell
And my life will never - I know full well -
Be the same again.

Merry Christmas Everyone

2009-12-24T11:18:00.002Z

Hi Everyone, I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas, I know I have been absent lately, I've been going through a bit of a hard time, obviously missing Aaron at this time of year is a given, but there are a few other things going on that I'm trying to figure out.

I'm hoping to make the new year a bit of a fresh start...emotionally certainly.

I miss my blogging, but thank you all for being there for me still.

Have a lovely Christmas,

Sal xxxxxxxxxx

Just for today xxxx and just because this made me smile xxx

2009-12-22T21:33:00.000Z

Just for this morning, I am going to smile when I see your face and laugh when I feel like crying.

Just for this morning, I will let you choose what you want to wear, and smile and say how perfect it is.

Just for this morning, I am going to step over the laundry, and pick you up and take you to the park to play.

Just for this morning, I will leave the dishes in the sink, and let you teach me how to put that puzzle of yours together.

Just for this afternoon, I will unplug the telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles..

Just for this afternoon, I will not yell once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and whine for the ice cream truck, and I will buy you one if he comes by.

Just for this afternoon, I won't worry about what you are going to be when you grow up, or second guess every decision I have made where you are concerned.

Just for this afternoon, I will let you help me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you trying to fix them.

Just for this afternoon, I will take us to McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can have both toys..

Just for this evening, I will hold you in my arms and tell you a story about how you were born and how much I love you.

Just for this evening, I will let you splash in the tub and not get angry.

Just for this evening, I will let you stay up late while we sit on the porch and count all the stars.
Just for this evening, I will snuggle beside you for hours, and miss my favourite TV shows.

Just for this evening when I run my finger through your hair as you pray, I will simply be grateful that God has given me the greatest gift ever given.

I will think about the mothers and fathers who are searching for their missing children, the mothers and fathers who are visiting their children's graves instead of their bedrooms, and mothers and fathers who are in hospital rooms watching their children suffer senselessly, and screaming inside that they can't handle it anymore.

And when I kiss you goodnight I will hold you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then, that I will thank God for you, and ask him for nothing, except one more day...

I wasn't speeding mum...honest.

2009-12-14T14:34:00.000Z

We all hate getting the dreaded phone call from school saying one of the kids has hurt themselves dont we.

I had to rush down to Deions school today as he had hurt his foot....

He swore to me that he was not speeding as he drove down the school corridoor and crashed through the fire doors...and I'd like to believe him, but the three hours in A & E and the x-ray showing a broken toe tells a whole different story!

Luckily, Deion is fine and resting his foot, me...I aged another ten years in the ten minutes it took me to get to him...and I really don't need that now I am...dare I say it...in my forties!!!

The big four OH!!!

2009-12-11T15:59:00.000Z

How did it happen, i don't feel any different to when i was in my teens, i am the same...well, until i look in the mirror and think 'bloody Hell who's that old hag looking back at me !!!'

Oh well, they say life begins at forty, luckily it didn't end for one person in my house who suggested i was now middle aged.

"I AM NOT MIDDLE AGED!" I gently bellowed.
"sorry, but forty is middle aged" said the perpetrator
"I guess it depends on how long you intend to live" I said "say it again and your middle age would have been twenty one years ago!"

Whats wrong with people?????

well, life/the house/work, is totally, insanely hectic, but i have insisted on a night off, I might even get to leave the house for recreational purposes...you never know xxxx

Happy Birthday Aaron.

2009-12-05T18:35:00.001Z

Today is a painful day for me, 18 years ago today, I became a mum. Unfortunately Aaron isn't here for me to give a birthday hug, words can't express the ache I feel about that.

The last 3 years without Aaron have been the hardest I have ever had to face,I miss him more than I thought I was capable of. But I am still celebrating in his honour in my own quiet way.

I don't regret a minute, Aaron is responsible for the person I am today and for that, I am eternally grateful.

I know wherever he is, he'll be having cake!

I thought it would be fitting to share the opening passage in his book with you.

The day I met Aaron!

It’s 3.17 am on Thursday the 5th December 1991 In Greenwich District hospital, London. After Twenty three and a half hours of labour, lots of kicking and screaming (me, not Aaron) the midwife finally bundled a tiny baby on my chest and I felt a rush of love like I never knew existed, fireworks went off in my chest, I’d just discovered the meaning of life. My son was here!

I knew something wasn’t right straight away, Aaron was very grey and he hadn’t cried yet, just as soon as I’d got my hands on him it seemed, the nurses whisked him back off me. There were people everywhere, doctors and nurses coming in and out of the room, lots of shouting, alarms going off. Not to mention the man at the end of the bed giving me so many stitches that I thought he was knitting a jumper. I thought he’d at least emerge with a pair of booties for the baby...nothing.

This isn’t what was supposed to be happening, we should all be crying with joy now, going all googly eyed over the top of our new babies head, meeting our new baby boy and counting his fingers and toes. Not hearing doctors saying that they couldn’t get him breathing, and asking each other how long he’d been down.

We waited for the longest seventeen minutes of our lives, Dave looked so scared, and I think I held my breath for the whole time, then; at last we heard a cry, it was the determined cry of the fighter my baby was about to have to become; and I just knew in my heart that everything was going to be o.k.

SCBU Special Care Baby Unit

The next couple of days were a blur of Special Care, wires, tubes and alarms. We were young, first time parents and completely bewildered by all the equipment, bleeps, and nurses. There were blood tests and brain scans and we couldn’t do a single thing. We used to sit there holding Aaron’s hands through the incubator doors, telling him how much we loved him, telling him how special he was, and willing him to be strong. He wasn’t a premature baby, like all the tiny ones in the other incubators, he was 9lb 1oz, he looked so healthy and chubby, so why was he here? What was going on?

Aaron had drips going into both his little arms, a tube going down his nose, a tube coming from his umbilical cord; he had a plastic box over his head with oxygen pumping into it, there were pads on his chest and probes of some sort on his finger and his toe. I had never even seen a baby in an incubator before, except on television. I didn’t really even know what all the wires and monitors were for, I just new my little boy was in there, in this plastic box, having things done to him that must have been hurting him. I was his Mum, he was mine, but I was powerless to stop it all. He must have been desperate for a cuddle, I know I was.

The doctors came round four or five times a day, whispering amongst themselves about our baby and the treatment he needed, us in our naivety not really realising we had the right to ask them exactly what they were saying, what they were going to do to make our baby well. Then they’d turn to us and tell us that he’d had a rough start and they would wait for him to improve, then they would all scuttle off again, move on to the next incubator, whisper about the next baby. We just thought that’s how it was.

My First Cuddle

I first held Aaron when he was two days old. A nurse had to take him out of the incubator and pass him to me, and we had to be careful of all the tubes and wires attached to him, I couldn’t quite believe that someone else had held my baby before I had, but as soon as he was in my arms, it didn’t matter. That was the most intense moment of my life, I fell in love with Aaron before he was even born, but this was the moment he tried to open his eyes and look at me, I made him a promise then and there that I would love him forever and keep him safe.

Before long I understood what all the monitors were for, the nurses were so lovely and explained everything as they were doing it. After the first couple of days, I was changing Aaron’s nappy and washing him, brushing his hair, none of it an easy task through the two small incubator doors! I got to cuddle him two or three times a day, we bonded just like any other mother and her first baby. It wasn’t quite how I imagined it, but things never always are.

Happy Birthday Aaron xxxxxx

its getting to that time of year

2009-12-04T16:28:00.000Z

It is now Dec, and like the last three Decembers I am getting nervous.

It used to be that December was my favourite month of all time, I became a mum on December the 5th, my birthday is the 11th and then of course there's Christmas.

We're big on Christmas, Aaron and I shared a love of all things tacky, if it jiggled, sang, glittered, we had to have it.

So now, I dread December, I don't get to celebrate Aarons birthday, not in the same way, so thinking about enjoying my own birthday a few days later falls flat, and Christmas is not the same without my Aaron.

I make sure we celebrate, and I do smile and love to see the kids faces light up, my fear is that I'm just going through the motions...or is that, in fact what I have to do until it comes naturally.

we may be upside down, but we're in!

2009-12-01T19:30:00.001Z

i have not given up my beloved blogging, i promise..but we are off line until British telecom pull their fingers out from their butts and get us on line, we are climbing the walls and i feel very cut off, but the good news is the house is great...or it will be when i clear enough boxes to be able to actually see it...

back v. soon...

hope you are all well, i will catch up with all your blogs as soon as i can xxxxx

from mad to worse!

2009-11-15T18:21:00.002Z

As you know, we have been waiting and chasing some of Deions hospital results for a while now. I am continually told that 'when there is something to tell, I shall be the first to know'...apparently not...

I rang up today to find out the results of a test Deion had in May...yes, do not adjust your screens, that was MAY! six whole months.

I demanded to speak to someone today, and with a sigh, they pulled Deions notes up on the computer...

"Oh," she said
"What???" I said, I went cold, broke out in a sweat and I think my heart stopped beating...
"Oh, well, we've had them back for a while, they were normal."

Of course, my relief that the result was normal meant I forgot to have a moan about someone actually neglecting to tell us this bit of information.

Wouldn't it be nice if just once, someone thought the parents had a right to know some vital piece of information about their child???

I guess I had better now phone up for the other four sets of results, they may be back too!!!!!

me....discriminatory???

2009-11-14T00:12:00.000Z

For the first time ever, I have been accused of discriminating...

Oh yes, the man who was trying to book our new phone line accused me of discriminating against 'able bodied people' when I explained to him that we could not be without our own number, and certainly not without a land line for a month due to Deion currently waiting for several hospital appointments, and the fact that we are waiting for about ten sets of result e.t.c

He told me I should not expect special treatment.

I did explain to him about the Disability discrimination Act and how companies have to make reasonable adjustments for those with disabilities, but to be honest, my heart wasn't in it, I'm so sick of it, all I wanted was to not be without a phone for any length of time so we don't miss an appointment and go back to the end of the queue. If it was just me, it wouldn't matter.

Of course, Mr sensitive on the other end sarcastically said 'I can't believe you don't have a mobile'

'I do arse wipe,' I said nicely, 'but that doesn't help much, when not all hospital departments won't actually ring them, they need a land line.'

Even after speaking to his manager, and her supervisor, I still don't know how quick it will be, I guess I need to spend the day phoning all the hospital departments, physios' e.t.c.and giving them a land line of someone, then, that person can get me on the mobile.....oh well...such is life, well, my life lol!

What I wonder is, if an elderly person needs a new phone line, a disabled person living alone....is there no priority service? Its a really bad system, I shall write a letter to head office when I get a minute.

can you really let superstition run your life

2009-11-12T13:52:00.000Z

I got a phone call today, offering Deion a cancellation appointment for tomorrow...of course, I was thrilled, it hardly ever happens that you get an appointment earlier than you expect.

The woman did double check that I didn't mind coming, and repeated the date 'Friday the thirteenth.'

"Ermm, no, no problem," I said a Little confused.

It turns out that the person who cancelled, did so because of the date and the other person who has been waiting longer than us, didn't want the appointment because of the date.

I don't know about you, but this seems a bit ridiculous to me, what do some people do, sit indoors wrapped in cotton wool that day.

My view is 'superstitions only have power if you believe in them'

I don't believe in them.

But, hey, I guess, for Deion's sake, I should be glad some people do!

truisms 3

2009-11-11T13:06:00.000Z

"I am careful not to confuse excellence with perfection. Excellence, I can reach for; perfection is God's business."
Michael J. Fox

looks familiar....

2009-11-09T19:59:00.000Z

The kids loved this, but all parents will love it for a different reason, this is too cute xxx

Excuses I've heard from people wishing to avoid helping with packing!!!

2009-11-08T13:29:00.001Z

But I didn't know what you wanted to keep. (Ermmm...ask me then)

I don't know what needs to go where. (See above)

You're so much quicker/better at it than me. (Only through necessity and forced practice at it)

I thought YOU'D like to organise it. (Derrr...)

But you are so good at organising. (Again...necessity)

You wrap things better than me/us. (Horse shit)

I know how you love that, I'd hate to break it. (Then don't)

You did it last time. (Not through choice)

I had no boxes. (Yes, like I have them hidden about my person on a daily basis)

Can't I do it later. (If only later ever arrived)

But I have loads of homework. (Okay, hard to argue with that)

I was going to go out with my friends. (Easy to argue with that)

And my all time favourite...

But I've been busy. (Of course, I sit on my arse drinking tea all day, so it gives me something to fill my empty days)

And also, how come every time I put something in the trash/recycle pile, one of you suddenly remembers its your favourite thing in the world...surely if it was, I would have seen you wear it/use it/play with it in the last decade???

the stress of the move

2009-11-06T08:09:00.001Z

If I ever say I want to move anywhere, ever again...find me and shoot me!!!

truisms 2

2009-11-04T11:02:00.000Z

Day off ... my a$$

2009-11-02T18:25:00.000Z

Okay, I have officially heard it all now.

I was off the work rota on Sunday Morning as I worked until 3am the night before/that morning. So I took the time, caught up with the washing, ironing, dusting (it was getting to the point where I could write my name in the layer on the bookshelf) I cooked three days worth of dinners, did the food shopping, threw myself in and out of the shower at lightening speed and then said to Dave, "I'm knackered," he replied "why, you've had the day off!!!"

Yes, he is still alive (just)

And yes, I did lecture him about what a day off should actually mean, I even through in a few not so friendly names....

And yes, I think he's learnt his lesson for now... if not I might need some advice on where to hide the body!!!

Truisms

2009-11-01T13:00:00.000Z

If you wanna see something really funny.....

2009-10-30T11:40:00.000Z

I laughed until my sides hurt, the best...the absolute funniest thing, is that he thinks he's so damn cool. Honestly, when his shoes flew off, I had trouble composing myself. Superb!

500...already????

2009-10-29T12:40:00.001Z

I cannot believe that I have actually written 500 posts. Okay, okay, some some weren't mine, some were e-mails or quotes or videos that I couldn't resist sharing. But 500 times I have clicked on that publish button and something that says something about me is out there on the world wide web.

Looking back, what makes me smile is how different my blog is to what I expected.

Originally, I was going to do a weekly update, talking about life as a parent with special needs children, about how to live with the loss of a child...I thought I was going to be giving support and advice to other parents like me.

And to a certain degree I think I have, sharing information is the best way to deal with many aspects of special needs and disability. But I have received just as much information back.

But what I didn't expect was to get into it and write about everything and anything that's on my mind, and what is even more amazing is the love and support I have received from my fellow bloggers. I didn't expect to love reading about the lives of people from all over the world, I didn't expect to be able to relate quite so much.

I feel less alone, I have an outlet, I can share the little things that make me laugh (or cry), things that otherwise go unsaid. I can have a bad day, rant, scream, cry, swear, and all I get back is support.

My biggest thanks has to be to Trojan of Trojan's Corner, he is the one that believed in me and what I had to say enough to encourage me to blog in the first place.

Here's to the next 500 if you can stand me for that long!!!!

not all men are bad...but.....this does make sense to me...

2009-10-28T10:37:00.000Z

EVE'S SIDE OF THE STORY

After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve.

'So, how is everything going?' inquired God.

'It is all so beautiful, God,' she replied. 'The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem.. It's these breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a real pain.'

And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc. She felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more symmetrically balanced'.

'That's a fair point,' replied God, 'But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away.'

And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes

Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden.

'Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?'

'Just fantastic,' she replied, 'But for one oversight. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone.'

God though for a moment and said, 'You know, Eve, you are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you.

Let's see.... where did I put that useless tit?'

Now doesn't THAT make more sense than all that crap about the rib?

tests, tests and more tests

2009-10-27T10:51:00.000Z

Poor old Deion's going through it at the moment.

I have written posts about the uncertainty surrounding Deion's condition before, and the reason I haven't spoken about it for a while, is simply because there has been nothing new to tell, no new news, no results. It's a bit like having something hanging over us, actually, its exactly that.

So our lovely, lovely consultant has been pulling some strings to get some stuff done. It means that Deion is going to be spending most of his half term back and forth to hospital appointments, but I'm sure he'll think of a way to compensate this hardship...its gonna cost me i just know it!

Deion had his hip and knee x-ray on Friday, as he is in some pain, we need to know why. We have a full physio assessment today, later this week, we have a meeting about botox to loosen his thigh muscles, a neurology appointment to discus a muscle biopsy, some investigations about the deterioration in his swallowing, and we need to figure out how to get two litres of fluid a day into a child that cannot swallow liquid effectively any longer.

What fun!

I know I'm not ready for a couple of the suggestions they are going to make about Deion's swallowing, they are not happy that we have to get so many calories into Deion, and maintaining is weight is harder all the time.

Hopefully we will get some answers this time. I have to remind myself that deion is tougher than I think. Whatever happens, I know he/we can deal with it.

since i'm talking about past present future....

2009-10-26T10:56:00.000Z

The present contains nothing more than the past, and what is found in the effect was already the cause

Henri Bergson

love this quote

2009-10-24T10:44:00.000+01:00

The future is purchased by the present

Samuel Jackson

Samuel Jackson is one of my husbands favourite actors, when you see him in interviews he seems to have a good balance on life, and this quote, though simplicity itself, is great.

hospital parking ggrrrrr!

2009-10-23T19:26:00.001+01:00

I have a huge complaint (just for a change!)

There not only needs to be far more parking at hospitals, but there needs to be more disabled spaces, and we should not have to pay extortionate amounts of money for using them.

Deion had to go and have his hips and knees x-rayed as he is getting some pain, not that uncommon for wheelchair users, but we need to check it out.

So we merrily went off to the hospital. It took us over half an hour to park, and no! not because I can't drive/park e.t.c but because there was just no room. This was at ten to nine this morning, so you'd think it would still be fairly quiet...nope!

There should be more larger spaces to accommodate wider vehicles so we have enough space so that we can open the door more than an inch and a half. And there certainly not be ridiculously low height restrictions so that anything higher than a go kart can't get under (of course the docs sports cars can all fit under rather nicely)...disabled vehicles are big you guys...think it through.

So off we go to our appointment, which really should have been quick, but we waited the obligatory hour and a half to go in. Although how they could possibly be running an hour and a half late at nine twenty, when the x-ray department only opens at nine is beyond me... obviously we have a bit of lifting on and off the bed to do for Deion, no such thing as a hoist in a hospital x-ray room, that would make waaay too much sense!

So two hours and two minutes later I went back to the car, put my ticket in the machine and oh, guess what, its three pounds an hour to park, but I had to pay nine pounds because I went two minutes over the hour....fair...NO!!!

Of course, my inability to keep my mouth shut about such matters meant I was duty bound to make a complaint to the parking control officer. He agreed with me totally (which I hated because I could hardly shout at the man for being nice and agreeing with me now could I???) and he gave me a form to fill in and send off to make a complaint. Which, yes, I will do, even though I know it will do absolutely nothing. And I know this because I have already filled in about seven of these forms before.

This horrified me, I had no idea.

2009-10-23T10:40:00.000+01:00

This is being circulated as a warning, please read, people need to be aware. I have sent it to everyone I know on e-mail as it is not common knowledge.

Yesterday, my youngest daughter, Halle who is just 4 years old, was rushed to the ER by her father for being severely lethargic and incoherent in her classroom.

He was called to her school by the school secretary who said that she was 'VERY VERY SICK'! He told me that when he arrived at her classroom, Halle was barely sitting in the chair. She couldn't hold her own head up and when he looked into her eyes, she couldn't focus them. He immediately scooped her up and rushed her to the closest ER, and then called me.

When he got there, they ran blood test after blood test and did x-rays, every test imaginable. Her white blood cell count was normal, nothing was out of the ordinary.

When I arrived at the ER, the doctor there told us that he had done everything that he could do so he was transferring her to Saint Francis Hospital for further tests.

Right as we were leaving in the ambulance, her teacher arrived at the ER and told us that after questioning Halle 's classmates, She had found out that our little girl had licked liquid hand sanitizer off of her hands!!!

Hand sanitizer, of all things. But it makes sense. These days they have all kinds of different scents and flavors and when you have a curious child, they are going to put all kinds of things into their mouths. When we arrived at the Saint Francis' HospitalER, we told the ER Doctor there to check her blood alcohol level, and yes we did get weird looks, but they did it.

The results showed her blood alcohol level was 85% -- six hours after we first took her.. There's no telling what it would have been if we would have requested it at the first ER. Since then, her school and a few surrounding schools have taken the liquid hand sanitizers out of all the lower grade classes, but what's to stop middle and high schoolers from ingesting this stuff? After doing research on the Internet, we found out that it only takes about 3 squirts of the stuff ingested to be fatal to a toddler. For her blood alcohol level to be so high, it would be like someone her size drinking120 proof liquor. So PLEASE PLEASE don't disregard this because we don't everwant another family to go through what ours has gone through.

http://www.truthorfiction.com/rumors/h/hand-sanitizer.htm http://www.snopes.com/medical/toxins/sanitizer.asp

Honey wheres the iron?

2009-10-22T21:27:00.000+01:00

How many men does it take to iron a shirt????

....I don't know, there is no evidence that its ever been attempted in my house.

pump it!

2009-10-22T10:52:00.000+01:00

My kids loved this song, and when they saw this video on you tube they laughed and laughed. Deion laughed so hard I had to remind him to breathe. I love this film anyway, despite having seen it about a thousand times.

a quote to match my mood!

2009-10-21T10:18:00.000+01:00

Set me a seal upon thine heart, as a seal upon thine arm; for love is stronger than death.

song of solomon, ch VIII,v6

yewww!!!

2009-10-19T11:27:00.000+01:00

does single not mean doing it single handedly???

2009-10-17T15:20:00.002+01:00

I don't know about you, but it makes me laugh when rich, famous, nanny hiring, celebs who employ enough staff to run a small country describe themselves as single mothers. It just doesn't pack the same punch for me.

"Appearing on CBS' Late Show with David Letterman in the US, the performer was asked what it was like being a single parent."

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Showbiz-News/Madonna-Would-Rather-Be-Hit-By-Train-Than-Marry-She-Tells-David-Letterman/Article/200910115397273?lpos=Showbiz_News_News_Your_Way_Region_7&lid=NewsYourWay_ARTICLE_15397273_Madonna_Would_Rather_Be_Hit_By_Train_Than_Marry%2C_She_Tells_David_Letterman

sanity??!!?? not so much!

2009-10-16T10:38:00.000+01:00

There are times (like most of the time) when i feel like i am the only sane person in my house. Okay, okay, I know there is evidence to the contrary i.e. the giant football, the bungee jump, the cake...whatever!

But it seems there are just some things you can't get through to my family....

Like...if you leave your clothes in a heap on the bedroom floor, it does not automatically follow that the next day, they will not be washed and ironed and in your closet.

Or...once you have eaten all the food, it does not automatically replace itself, i do not have a magic refrigerator.

Even simple things, like, i can't be in two (or three) places at once, money doesn't grow on trees, and i only have one pair of hands.

yet another special needs child loses their life

2009-10-15T15:13:00.000+01:00

Whether or not the parents were involved, one thing is for sure, this child and family did not get the support they needed. Its yet another in a long line of cases where a child slips through the net and loses their Innocent young life needlessly.

"The parents of an eight-year-old girl found hanged in her bedroom have been arrested in connection with her death.
Simon and Susan Moody were interviewed under caution immediately after finding Charlotte Avenall's body at their home in Mansfield last month.
The young girl, who had severe learning disabilities, was discovered hanged in her bedroom on September 12.
Mr Moody, 32, and his 24-year-old wife Susan have been arrested in connection with her death.
Following her death, Nottinghamshire County Council's social services department said it would be reviewing the care and support it offered Charlotte and her family.
She was known to social services from birth and attended Birklands Primary School in nearby Warsop."

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Charlotte-Avenall-Hanged-In-Mansfield-Nottinghamshire-Parents-Arrested/Article/200910115397324?lpos=UK_News_Third_UK_News_Article_Teaser_Region__2&lid=ARTICLE_15397324_Charlotte_Avenall_Hanged_In_Mansfield_Nottinghamshire%3A_Parents_Arrested

I'M PUTTING DOWN THE CAKE....NOW!!!

2009-10-14T15:22:00.000+01:00

AND HEADING DOWN THE GYM!!!

Victoria and Albert Museum

2009-10-13T12:41:00.000+01:00

My daughter Robyn had a Sunday to herself, no school, homework up to date, no karate /horse riding/work experience/extra curricular lessons....so how does she chose to spend it...like this....

Robyn had a school art trip to the Victoria and Albert Museum last week, however, time was limited, so she (being the perfectionist she is) wanted to go back to make sure her sketches were accurate, and to maybe add a few more.

I can't complain, she wants it to be right bless her.

Its a lovely museum, I haven't been for years, I loved the buddahs, so here are a few pictures of our favourite things.

oops, thats ruined your reputation!

2009-10-12T10:48:00.000+01:00

my daughter had a special evening at school on Wednesday, her teachers want her to do triple sciences as she's so clever...i know I'm gushing, but, my kids are brilliant, so i have that right!!!!

it was actually quite a good evening, a talk followed by some demonstrations of chemical reactions.

only we were not expecting an explosion, everyone in the hall jumped, a few gasped, one yelped, but only one person yelled F**K at the top of their lungs....yep, me...my daughter is not happy, and probably concerned how it looks for her...oh well... I'm just grateful i didn't pee my pants (it was close!)

My First Blogaversary

2009-10-11T12:36:00.005+01:00

I can't believe its a year to the day that I started blogging. My good Friend Trojan,(Trojan's Corner) not only suggested it, helped me set it up (as in...he did most of the work lol) and he has given me nothing but encouragement all along.

I can hardly remember life before blogging now. I have been able to reach out to so many people, and have been helped and supported by more people, from more places than I could ever have imagined.

I had to laugh when Iwent back to our intentions a year ago, http://sallyannestephenson.blogspot.com/2008/10/hi-im-sally-i-live-in-london-with-my.html I was going to put out a blog once a week...crikey, I've done at least one a day...

I was going to only talk about issues that surround being a parent of children with special needs...

Well, that all went out the window, i chat about anything and everything, this is my online diary, thought process and has been great for meeting new people...

So thankyou for reading and supporting...

And special love to you Trojan xxxxx

life.....so true...

2009-10-10T08:55:00.000+01:00

Have you noticed, that the more you hurry, the slower you go?

The more you wait, the longer it takes?

The more you worry, the less you dream?

But the more you live, love, and laugh, the more you live, love, and laugh.

When the wife don't listen

2009-10-09T15:20:00.000+01:00

OMG this is so funny, wrong? cruel?...yes, but hilarious too!!!!

once again...sorry!

2009-10-08T07:10:00.002+01:00

i seem to be continuously apologising for ignoring everyone. i can't say how much i miss spending a little time on all of your blogs each day, but there just doesn't seem to be a spare minute. i used to spend those nighttime hours when i couldn't sleep on the blog...now I'm out working and spending my time with people far less savory than all of you.

gosh, i thought i was busy before i am now looking back on my life a couple of months ago and feeling that it was quite leisurely!!!!

I am trying to get it to balance out, and I'll be back commenting and posting much more...

right off to work...i think the phrase 'you'll meet yourself coming backwards' was meant for me.

I am also concerned, as one phrase pops up alot! and that's 'no rest for the wicked'...okay, i don't think I'm wicked, but its starting to worry me lol!

have a great day all of you....

Motherhood, the cheaper option.

2009-10-04T10:17:00.000+01:00

Now, you would think that having a paying job (as well as all the other stuff you do, which roughly equates to five jobs anyway...but thats a blog post for another day!) would mean that you would be better off financially.

When you sit down and work out the cost of actually going back to work, decent clothes that aren't elasticated and designed not to show childrens food and mess, shoes that look smart rather than comfy, travel, childcare, and take out for dinner on days when you just havent got to the supermarket or are not home....it means financially you barely break even.

Its actually cheaper to stay home, and then as a bonus you don't have anyone moaning at you because the dry cleaning isn't picked up, or the printers out of ink, or clothes aren't ironed on the right day, or we're out of the right t-bags, or the house is a bomb site.

You can hardly blame parents for staying home can you? It's the cheaper option!

Some things just make you sick to your stomach...

2009-10-03T15:04:00.000+01:00

This is one of them.

This story has been all over the news the last couple of days. It highlights the depravity of some members of society... three people have been charged with horrific child abuse and distributing pornographic images of children...one of them is a nursery worker, all of them are parents.

Now police and social workers are trying to work out who the children are in the images. Aparently so bad, they could not even describe them for the press.

It is the worst kind of abuse of trust, abusing the most vulnerable. Abusing innocent children while their parents feel they are in a safe, secure, loving enviroment.

Some freinds and I were talking about this, and one felt that it almsot seems worse when its women involved, is this true????

"Female sex abuse often remains hidden behind the veil of happy family life and the apparently normal relationship between mother and child so victims are less likely to come forward.
And those in contact with the family are less likely to notice what is happening.
This combined with the stigma and silence surrounding the issue means the result is chronic under-reporting.
The statistics in this field are dangerously inadequate, but it is estimated that at least 25% of victims of sexual abuse are abused by women.
Two years ago the Behavioural Analysis Unit at CEOP (The Child Expoloitation and Online Protection taskforce) began a study into female sex offenders.
The results are still several years away, but Graham Hill, leading the team, expects the findings to show a high incidence of female sex offending.

These monsters are due to be sentenced next month. one things for sure, whatever happens to them, will be less than they deserve.

My heart goes out to the babies and their families, imagine how hard it will be for them to let those children out of their sight again, imagine how hard it will be to ever trust anyone again. As parents we are told to show preference to well run, registered nurseries rather than child minders... tell these parents that!

to read more click here....

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Nursery-Abuse-Vanessa-George-Angela-Allen-And-Colin-Blanchard-Admit-Child-Sex-Assault-Offences/Article/200910115396963?lpos=UK_News_Third_UK_News_Article_Teaser_Region__4&lid=ARTICLE_15396963_Nursery_Abuse%3A_Vanessa_George%2C_Angela_Allen_And_Colin_Blanchard_Admit_Child_Sex_Assault_Offences

mad cow

2009-10-02T09:54:00.000+01:00

Three different people sent me this...do you think they are trying to tell me something???

I posted it, because, you know when you see something, and it really gets to you, and you find it hilarious, and every time you think of it you laugh....this did that for me.

hmm..perhaps I can relate!

A message from an angel!

2009-10-01T09:35:00.002+01:00

I just had to write and tell you about a recent experience.

A friend of mine has a distant aunt, they found each other on face book recently. It turns out that this aunt is a medium, a good one, she's been on TV, travelled all over the world doing this, some of her customers are famous people.

While she was talking to my friend, she told her that she could see a little boy, and told her to ask his mum to phone her...nothing else was said.

Well, I did phone, she arranged to phone me back another day at a quiet time...and I'm so glad she did. She knew things, that no-one else knew, she described my house, where I keep a box of Aaron's things, other mundane things he sees me doing. She named the names of his Friend's his favourite uncle, my grandparents...it was pretty special. She knew his favourite toys, teddy, food, games, it was amazing. There is not one thing she said that didn't mean something to me, even if it was confusing for her.

But most of all, the best thing, the thing that was indisputable was... when she described how she had had a mad day, was worn out, so she decided to go to leave me a message saying we would rearrange and go to bed instead...well, apparently she tried but Aaron wouldn't let her, she said he drove her crazy with his incessant 'ring my mum, ring my mum' she said it was like that scene out of Ghost when Patrick Swayze wants Whoopie Goldberg to phone Molly....

Of course, there isn't another person who ever existed as stubborn as Aaron, so this really made me smile. There are times when I feel Aaron, particular moments, and recently Dragon from mysterious creature told me how to contact aaron in dreams...this medium knew all about this and told me not to doubt it.

I feel calmer somehow, less worried that he is lost, or lonely, or not being looked after...and certainly there is no doubt he is with us all....

Big breath in, my heart feels joyful today!

angel friend

2009-09-30T09:30:00.000+01:00

I don't know who wrote this, but it was sent to me by a friend and I wanted to share it.

When I have no one to turn to
And I am feeling kind of low,
When there is no one to talk to
And nowhere I want to go,

I search deep within myself
It is the love inside my heart
That lets me know my Angels are there
Even though we are miles apart.

A smile then appears upon my face
And the sun begins to shine.
I hear a voice, so soft and sweet
Saying, 'Everything will be just fine'

It may seem that I am alone
But I am never by myself at all.
Whenever I need my Angels near
All I have to do is call.

An Angel's love is always true
On that you can depend.
They will always stand behind you
And will always be your friend.

Through darkest hours and brightest days
Our Angel's see us through
They smile when we are happy,
and will cry when we are blue..

Thanks for being my Angel my friend
I will be there for you until the end.

I wish

2009-09-29T09:10:00.000+01:00

This is a song that always makes me think of Aaron, not just because R.Kelly was his favourite singer, but because the words (especially the chorus) are lovely.....and apt...

"I wish that I could hold you now
I wish that I could touch you now
I wish that I could talk to you
Be with you somehow
I know you're in a better place
Even though I can't see your face
I know you're smiling down on me
Saying everything's okay

And if i make it out this life
I'll see you again someday
I wish, I wish, I wish
I wish, I wish, I wish"

Wheelchairs are not welcome here!!!!!

2009-09-28T10:07:00.000+01:00

You will not believe what happened to us the other day...actually...sadly, you probably will. We were not allowed in a shop because Deion may have broken something while in his wheelchair...apparently, kids in electric chairs are NOT ALLOWED. Pushable ones, and buggies are okay, but electric chairs are too much of a risk in the breakable goods department.

Okay,I'll tell you what I wanted to break, and it wasn't anything they were selling in the shop!!!

"So let me get this straight?" I asked in something just below roar level! "Disabled people are not allowed in your store."

"Oh yes, of course they are," said 'thick as shit' store assistant, "just not kids in electric chairs!"

Well,I don't need to go on about the small argument that ensued, and there's certainly no need to repeat any of the threats made (who me?)...

But the manager was called, we were assured that it IS NOT store policy to keep out electric chairs, and the 'thick as shit' assistant got it wrong. Apologies were made, I resisted the urge to tell Deion to drive around at top speed like demolition derby and break everything he could (very understanding of us I think!)

And I know what will happen next, we'll get a letter of apology from head office and some store vouchers, I know this, because it happened once before in another store. I don't want the bloody store vouchers, I want to be able to go shopping with my son and not be turned away because he's in a wheelchair...simple...you'd think! The vouchers will be rolled up and returned with a suggestion of where they should put them!

Okay, I know we are moving ahead, and things are improving...but come on...can we get there a bit quicker please, people are being treated like second/third class citizens here! GGRRRRR!

wheelchair stickers!

2009-09-27T09:21:00.000+01:00

If you know anyone who has a wheelchair, and you want some stickers or number plates, then let me know. Deion and his Friends love theirs and I send samples to my t-shirt customers, they are great, and I have loads...so let me know and I'll stick (sorry couldn't resist) some in the post.

deion asked me to share this....

2009-09-26T10:01:00.000+01:00

I take no responsibility what so ever.......

moving day

2009-09-25T09:24:00.000+01:00

We have finally got acompletion date for the move...five weeks....where do I start??? how on earth did we manage to accumulate so much stuff???

I'm being ruthless, the toys they don't play with are going to the hospital, the clothes they no longer wear are going to the charity shop, Daves twenty million boxes of paperwork spanning 20 years are going in the shredder...any kitchen appliances that were obviously bought in order to keep me in the kitchen 'doing' for everyone else...binned! any clothes I have kept, waiting for them to come back into fashion, recycled, I don't think the charity shops even want my multitude of power suits with shoulder pads to rival that of any footballers.

I want zen like minimalism, well in one room at least.

I am looking forward to living in our new house, but I am dreading the move itself. The disorganisation of being upside down...

The kids are busy planning colours for their new rooms, which would be fine if Deion didn't want orange and black...I need to find a compromise.

Okay, I'm off to tackle the cupboard under the stairs now, I dread to think what I'll find..... probably the bones of the last guy who came to read the meter...

cry baby

2009-09-24T12:24:00.000+01:00

I can't remember the last time I had a good cry, I go into zombie mode instead. Some sort of self preservation I guess...today, I can't seem to stop, my emotions seem so close to the surface.

I can't seem to get a hold of my emotions this last few weeks, I was so angry the other week I wanted to strangle someone, now, today, the slightest thing (and I mean the slightest thing) and I want to cry.

I suppose there have been a few changes lately, Deion becoming more independent and going to big school for one, more working and even less sleep for me for another, and with the move coming up.

I don't know...sorry, nothing positive to say today....ignore me!

quote

2009-09-23T14:09:00.000+01:00

Sometimes you can tell whats been going on in my life by the quotes I put in a post...this is DEFINITELY one of those times!!!

"He finally accepted that if you don't succeed, then try doing it how your wife suggested in the first place!"

I loved when we spent birthdays like this

2009-09-22T13:43:00.004+01:00

I loved when the kids were small, and birthdays were all about cake and balloons.

Now they are all about the right dress and make overs.

Robyn was 15 at the weekend, and no, she didn't want a McDonald's party, or to go to the park or adventure playground, she wanted to shop til she dropped and to have a sophisticated lunch with her friends....

Where do the years go???

The smiles worth a trashed house!!!

2009-09-21T12:03:00.000+01:00

Okay, so i know i said yesterday the ball was probably a mistake, but look at Deion having fun with it...everything else is replaceable, can't buy smiles like that!!!!

Okay! I admit it, I didn't think it through!

2009-09-20T14:22:00.000+01:00

Yes, I'm not quite sure what I was thinking, I was out and simply saw this, thought crikey, that's a bargain, and bought it because I know Deion will love it, he can actually play wheelchair football/soccer in this.

Of course, I hadn't banked on Dave seeing it first and taking out the table lamp, an ornament and almost killing the computer monitor....

I blame his mum, apparently when he was little, she would tell him off for playing soccer in the house and follow it up with "when you own your own house, you can play soccer in it."

I have asked her about this, and she didn't look quite as put out as I would have hoped.

Worst of all, I heard myself saying it to Jordan about tennis the other day!!!

I don't know whether to hide it now, or give them a chance, I guess, I could pack away anything breakable, valuable, precious!!!

You gotta admit though, it looks cool!

Finally, someone has realised my superhero status!

2009-09-19T14:14:00.000+01:00

Wonder Woman is my all time favourite hero, so I want to thank my good friend Wendy for a gift i received in the post today.

She saw it and thought of me, i am touched, but then, i often am by the things that Wendy says and does, she is a lovely person and has been a great support to me over the years.

We met because she was Aaron's teacher...goodness...about 10 years ago. Wendy is an outstanding special needs teacher, and has this perfect way of being firm but fun...although when i look back at the photos, an extraordinary amount of her lessons involved food!!

Wendy always made us mums feel like we were doing a great job. She is well loved, and remains special to us. I always said that Aaron found us the best people, and he found us Wendy.

Now, in my eyes, Wendy is a bit of a wonder woman herself, although i prefer to covet the title, she really is. no matter what she's been through, is going through, I've never seen her feel sorry for herself once. spirited, modest, loving, and yes, sorry Wendy, a Little crazy too (the best of us are!)

So here is a picture of my gift, i didn't include me head and face, it's been a long day, i have no time for make-up, and i didn't want to give you nightmares.

I love it!!!

Do you have a dirty mind?

2009-09-18T20:46:00.000+01:00

Apparently, if you see anything other than dolphins, you have a filthy mind!!!

I don't get it, I only see dolphins, what else is it supposed to be ;)

The things kids say!!!!!

2009-09-17T11:25:00.000+01:00

Today, I came to realise that I may be too open with the kids. especially Deion, who can't seem to keep his mouth shut about anything!

The kids know what I do, I tell them about some of the kids I see, what they go through, how they live, the trouble they are in and whats ahead for some of them. I don't give them details, especially not when its a rape of murder case, I don't want to to give them nightmares, but it's just so they can see where that road can lead, and perhaps to make them more aware of the dangers around them.

Part of what I do means that I will go into a prison if a juvenile needs to be questioned. So today, I have to go to a prison, be escorted with a kid to the local police station where he can be interviewed, then be escorted back to prison, then I can leave.

Little did I know that Deion happily went off to school telling them that "Mummy's going to prison today!"
of course it doesn't help that he has been telling them that I go to police stations ALOT!!!

They are aware (NOW!) of what I do, thank goodness, I just hope he hasn't been telling his friends the same thing...I don't expect we'll have many friends round for tea if they tell their mum that they want to come to Deion's house, but by the way, his mum is in prison....

Kids!!! still, you gotta see the funny side!

Nobody Puts Baby In A Corner

2009-09-15T10:47:00.003+01:00

I grew up on Dirty Dancing, I must have seen the film thousands of times, and even though Dave never liked it, he took me to the stage show for our anniversary a couple of years ago.

Its part of my teens, and I still love it today... so as a tribute to Patrick Swayze on this sad day, here is the last dance scene, my favourite, can't watch this without getting a pang in your heart. xxxx

still here...sort of!

2009-09-14T10:47:00.000+01:00

I haven't fallen off the face of the earth as you might think, and believe me, it has felt like that a couple of times... I have a new job that is taking up any precious spare moments I had.

It's rewarding, but busy. I'm working as an 'appropriate adult'...which means that when anyone under 17 or an adult who's mentally vulnerable gets arrested, I am there to make sure their rights and welfare are maintained while they are in custody and while being interviewed.

I have travelled all over London so far. And, there are moments, say when its 2am, and I have to be up in three hours, and I'm still at a police station miles away trying to convince a 14 year old, with over sixty previous offences, that its in their best interests to consult a solicitor, that I wonder what I'm doing!

I'm spending so much time in the custody suite, I'm beginning to empathise with the prisoners!

There's been a couple of good moment's, the other day I got called a white, bitch, whore, social worker....

"hey, I object to being called a social worker," I said.

It broke the ice, he was okay with me after that.

There's been a couple of shaky moments too, like having a chat with a (huge) guy who beat two women to a pulp, because he hears voices telling him that women are the devil...that's really not much fun. Then again, I think my husband hears those voices too!!!!

Generally, once people realise you are there to help them and not judge them, they are okay.

It is certainly an eye opener, and it makes me appreciate my own parents and upbringing, my own kids, and even more, it makes me dislike the system that lets these people down so often.

So if I am about a bit less than normal, if I'm not posting every day, you know why. Hopefully life will settle back down soon...HA!!!

Deion's week!

2009-09-12T08:46:00.000+01:00

Enthusiastic is the word best used to describe Deion's feeling for school, he's had a brilliant week.

The school have worked hard, got the balance just right, and the people they have hired for Deion gel really well with him. They are keeping in touch every day, I couldn't ask for more. The teachers have praised him, his helpers have laughed with him and Deion is relentless in making sure they know they support really bad soccer teams!

The older kids have told him what a cool wheelchair he has (it is cool!) and the lunch ladies have taken a shine to him, he seems to get an extraordinary amount of food, and still come home with lots of change!

Deion is worn out by the end of the day, but still can't wait to tell us about his adventures.

P.E. was a concern for me, but the coach has got the balance right too, Deion is a sort of mini coach, so he timed the kids doing the bleep tests. I think he may have been a little over zealous in his motivational technique, but I'll bet they ran faster lol!

My baby's growing up fast!

8 years ago today

2009-09-11T07:25:00.006+01:00

I was walking into the gas station to pay for gas when I heard someone say that a plane had just crashed into one of the twin towers, "Don't be ridiculous" said someone else, so he held out his phone and showed a us a text. The guy behind the counter turned on the TV behind him and we stood and watched as we realised that the lives of millions of people would be changed forever. In the end, no-one moved, no-one payed, we just stood there watching the horror unfold, about twenty of us stood still in shock, even a little boy of about five, stood clinging silently to his mums hand.

The news and TV was nothing but that for weeks, like millions of others, I had nightmares over the footage, the people leaping out of windows put my heart in my mouth, the shock the loss, the dreaded reminder that life is so precious and can be over so quickly. To kiss your husband, wife, daughter, son, off to work and never see them again.

The feeling of being able to do nothing was overwhelming, even for those of us who were thousands of mile away, or didn't know anyone there, the world was united in grief for those who were lost, and those who were left behind. United in anger at the monsters capable of ending so many Innocent lives.

It really was the day the world stood still!

new kitchen

2009-09-09T09:23:00.000+01:00

We went looking for a new kitchen over the weekend, I walked into the showroom, knew what I wanted, knew what would work for me...simple.

I was shocked at the amount of input everyone else in the family had...especially as they all spend about...ooh...ZERO percent of their time in the kitchen!!!

Even Deion decided he didn't like my cabinet choice, he prefered the black and orange ones (I kid you not!)Dave was critical over my double oven choice, ridiculous, seeing as he would know how to turn the old one on if I asked him.

Do I really need a dishwasher? "NO," I said, "but everyone else will have to chip in with the washing up."

Silence.

okay, it now appears dishwasher is at the top of the list.

It was ridiculous, a 30 minute job turned into two hours of everyone else deciding what I should have to cook with.

Jordan and Robyn do like to chip in with the cooking, they haven't got to the clearing up after themselves bit yet, so invariably when they emerge with a masterpiece, the kitchen looks like a tornado has passed through, but they are trying.

So in the end we left with nothing, I'm going to go back all by myself, I shall chose what I want.

love

2009-09-08T10:58:00.000+01:00

Let your love be sincere a real thing; hate what is evil loathe all ungodliness, turn in horror from wickedness, but hold fast to that which is good.

Romans 12: 9

tagged...

2009-09-07T07:32:00.000+01:00

Trojan fron Trojan's Corner tagged me... so here goes...

1. What’s your current obsession? Chocolate, Salsa and Chocolate (did I mention chocolate?)

2. What’s your weirdest obsession? Tidiness, having things lined up just right, towels, tins, jars...!!!

3. What are you wearing today? Vera Wang...kidding...jeans of course!

4. Why is today special? I get to spend the day with my kids.

5. What would you like to learn to do? Master salsa so that I'm fabulous, and stay calm in life always!

6. What’s the last thing you bought? About a million pounds worth of school uniform and school equipment...

7. What are you listening to right now? Deion and Robyn talking about Battle Strikers, if only you asked me ten minutes ago, I could have said I was listening to a lecture on child psychology, I would have sounded far more intelligent.

8. What’s your favorite weather? Hot, sunny, sunshine, with a lovely warm sea breeze if poss.

9. What’s your most challenging goal right now? Staying sane (oops! failed miserably)

10. What do you think about the person who tagged you? Trojan is a great guy with a big heart, creative, fun, supportive, honest (sometimes too much so lol) and enthusiastic always xxx.

11. What's your favorite guilty pleasure? chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate.

12. Favorite vacation spot? Bimini in the Bahamas.

13. What would you like to have in your hands right now? I'd have Aaron's hand in mine, I'd never let go!

14. What would you like to get rid of? Guilt, frustration and anger...and maybe about three inches off my arse!

15. If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go: Rome!

16.Which language do you want to learn? Fluent Italian, I know enough to get by, I'd love to be fluent.

17.What super power would you like to possess? Invisibility (I spent an extraordinary amount of time thinking about this lol!)

18. What’s your favorite thing about the city you live in? I love the diversity.

19.What’s your favorite piece of clothing in your own closet? I have a mandarin style dress that I love, it makes me feel so elegant, I hardly ever get to wear it, but when I do I feel like a princess.

20. What’s your dream job? Running a Dolphin Program.

21. If you had $/£/€150 now what would you spend it on? Chocolate.... no, sadly, bills!

22. Do you admire anyone’s style? Audrey Hepburn for the past, Victoria beckham for now.

23.Describe your personal style. I'd love to be able to say Cool, smart and sexy like Trojan did LOL....but I hate to lie, so I'll have to say, the first thing I find in my closet, mainly jeans and t-shirts, practicality wins out in my house I'm afraid!

24. Who’s fashion show would you want tickets to? Errmmm, Calvin Klein (mens underwear preferably)?

25. If you had to slap one person with no repercussions, who would it be and why? Well, theres a certain doctor who I would love to slap...actually, I take that back, slappings too good, I actually want to run over him in the car....I would slap Russel Brand (he annoys me and needs a good wash, can someone please brush his hair???) Pete Doherty (same washing reason) Amy Winehouse (sort yourself out) Lady Gaga (put some clothes on woman) Katie Price (grow up) Kerry Katona (YOUR A MUM START ACTING LIKE ONE)...okay, I got carried away, sorry!

26. What are you most proud of? My Kids.

27. If you could choose one person to have lunch with who would it be and why? Okay, I know I should say somehthign deep and meaningful here, but Deion is desparate to meet Lewis Hamilton, so I'd take Deion to meet him. It would make his year, and after what he's been through lately, goodness, he'd deserve it.

Now the rules of this tag:

1. Respond and rework: answer the questions on your blog, replace one question you dislike with a question of your own invention
2. Tag 7 other people you would love to learn more about.

Click on the links below to discover seven wonderful and diverse blogs!

1. Gloria's Spanish View

2. Thoughts by Dena

3. http://www.islandroar.com/

4. Grandma's Page

5. http://jjinla.blogspot.com/

6. Funk Squared

7. Beauty Be Good

He Left Me!

2009-09-04T20:16:00.003+01:00

Don't worry, I don't mean my husband, although, that would be preferable to the heart wrenching agony I felt when Deion wheeled himself into his first day at secondary school.

I actually thought I was having a heart attack at one point, all the while Deion was saying "don't worry mum, I can handle it." I think I don't like realising I have to let go, and he's my baby, the youngest, the last one.... I don't like to believe I am not as needed as I think I am!

Deion had a great day, he looked so grown up, he made lots of new friends, reconnected with those from primary school. He was full of tales of having his own lift key, a classroom assistant that supports a 'like, totally, rubbish' football team and what he had for lunch.

It turns out that the nervous breakdown and the mild stroke I had were unwarranted.

The pictures make my heart melt, I am a proud mum....here's my 'not so' baby!!!

Pop Art - Sin City Style

2009-09-03T13:01:00.000+01:00

Trojan (Trojan's Corner) posted this on his blog recently. It made me laugh, and bought back a good memory, so I stole it!!!

Please note, out of the two of us...Trojan is the only one who looks evil!!!

I came across this picture which Sally (Sally's World) and I done a few months ago. As you can see were messing around with the one of the functions of my Mac computer. Any ideas on a title for this masterpiece?

ready for school

2009-09-02T11:55:00.000+01:00

As I mentioned, we've spent the last few weeks getting organised for the imminent return to school, we've been to the school outfitters, the stationers, every shoe shop within a twenty mile radius, we've sewn on badges, labels, paired socks, sharpened pencils, packed bags, trimmed hair, organised timetables....

Of course, goes without saying Deions special bathroom, toilet chair, changing table, hoists, slings, tables, care workers, key workers, classroom assistants, storage, fire evacu chairs, care plan, physio plan, O.T. plan, is all in place (the usual!!!)

But we are ready, two days to go and they are all abandoning me again... mixed emotions for me...I shall spend the first hour wandering around the house enjoying peace and quiet, then I shall clean and scrub for the next three, then I shall start missing them and counting down to four o clock, where they will all stampede through the house like a herd of elephants, or in Deion's case a demon driver....then I shall start counting down the hours until they leave for school again the next morning.

Hard to please...who me???

That'll teach

2009-09-01T19:01:00.000+01:00

Because Deion sees the incontinence specialist, I have to monitor what he drinks and weigh his pads...its a whole big story about kidney and bladder function that I don't need to bore you with.

So to make it easier for me to monitor, Deion has a 500ml juice bottle.

Occasionally Dave will pick up the bottle and take a drink (an argument about his laziness to get his own drink, and making Deion's chart off usually ensues).

Now, since Deion had his appendix out, he's been constipated and having trouble going, so the doctor has given him some Movacol....2 saches a day in his 500ml bottle, and let me tell you it really works.

Now, I have been known very occasionally to be a tad evil!!! so when Dave picked up Deion's juice bottle and gulped it down, I didn't say anything, in fact, I told him to go ahead and finish it and I'd make Deion another (insert evil laugh here).

Of course, we all took an extraordinary amount of pleasure in telling him afterwards that the drink was laced!!! I feigned forgetfulness of course!

Note to self, stay away from bathroom after Dave....

I'm guessing he may leave Deions drinks alone from now on....

Tweet!

2009-09-01T09:16:00.000+01:00

After my 'anger' post, a friend sent me this....made me laugh out loud!

uh oh...

2009-08-31T15:54:00.000+01:00

yep, I was fed up and I just ate a cake, and do go thinking we are talking a cup cake, even a small, "serves seven" effort...nope, a "serves 12, chocolate decadence..."

I feel a little sick....bblllluuurrrghhhhh!!!!

Anger management!

2009-08-30T10:36:00.000+01:00

I like to think of myself as a fairly calm person, I feel I have had alot to deal with in life, and I always pick myself up, dust myself off and start again.

Okay, so I can almost hear you all scoffing in amazement, and I know I have told you all about a few of the times I have gotten very angry...but that doesn't count, they were all instances of protecting/sticking up for my children, everyone knows that's 'free' anger...

But there are just days when I feel so bloody angry I actually want to jump up and down and have a full blown tantrum.

It's not anything specific, its just a feeling, I don't get it, there are days when people are so rude to me, or so horrid to me, and I can smile and let it go, then there are days when a tiny thing, no-ones doing, can send me over the edge.

I'm pretty good at hiding it (surprise surprise) but where does it go, what happens to the internalised anger???

Breakdown

2009-08-29T15:22:00.000+01:00

Okay, we're stranded, Deion's wheelchair broke down yesterday....the repair man came out today to fix it, after lots of chin rubbing, lots of head shaking, muttering about parts and components, he announced he couldn't fix it, he had to order parts. So he's taken it away, as he didn't have the right tools.

I guess mechanics are mechanics!

I am now panicking about Deion having it for return to school....

Throwing money away

2009-08-29T10:02:00.000+01:00

We had to go back to the school outfitters for one more thing today, and I think I did something silly...but for the right reason (I think!!!) When I was paying, the proprietor said that he was going to give me a discount for Deion.... now, I know what your thinking, "keep your mouth shut, take the discount..." but not me, before I knew it my mouth had overridden my brain (AGAIN!!!) and said 'WHY?'

The guy probably thought he was being nice, but it smacked of pity, no-one else got money off, does a wheelchair entitle you to discount in any other store....ermmm...no!

In my defense, if I hadn't asked, Deion would have. Its hards treating him the same as everyone else is it...big sigh!

JJ's results

2009-08-28T14:47:00.000+01:00

I'm a proud mum, Jordan passed all his exam's (seventeen SEVENTEEN!!!) All A's apart from a couple of B's and one C (German). He got an A star in Chemistry....

Huge sigh of relief and pride!

Well done J xxxxxxx

Exam results

2009-08-28T09:58:00.000+01:00

Jordan has gone to school to get his exam results.

I'm not really worried (she says as she paces the room and bites her nails), Jordan is brighter than most, certainly left me behind in the school work years ago. He's not nervous, he says he knows he's aced them (note to self, do something about Jordan's confidence levels)

Its a first for me, even though he isn't my eldest, Aaron never took exams, even if he'd still been with us he wouldn't have. His achievements were measured in many other, and quite frankly, more fun ways by his school.

It will be different again for Deion. Deion has already shown some nervousness about his. He's just done the Sat's at primary and he found it quite stressful. He got extra time, there is a system so that depending on disability, extra time is awarded, and Deion can even have a scribe for some parts, and can use his specially adapted computer for others.

But all this stuff is time consuming, so even though Deion knows his stuff, he finds it hard to record it in time.

I've told him not to worry about it now, its three years away (but oh my, how quick that will pass)

I guess its just one other thing he has to deal with.....

Skills On Wheels

2009-08-27T09:29:00.000+01:00

Deion has come up with a new slogan, he's very proud of himself, he's been wearing 'Wheelchair Demon' and 'Wicked on Wheels' for a while, and he asked me if he could have a 'skills on Wheels' one.

So here it is, what do you think? This is the first time we've used the gold and silver lettering too.

Lots of people have seen it and ordered it, I love the feedback we get from kids wearing these t-shirts, they are really making a statement, its fabulous.

Spot the difference

2009-08-26T09:49:00.000+01:00

I was reflecting earlier at the difference of Deion going on to secondary school as opposed to Jordan and Robyn going.

When it was their turn, I stressed about making sure we had all the right uniform and stationary,and I worried about the size of the school and them getting lost because they were used to such a small primary school, but it struck me how different it was this time, how different the things I am scared of are!

While we were in the school outfitters and we were trying on Blazers, we had to consider different things, after all, Deion's going to be sitting in a wheelchair, the blazer has to be comfy for that, not too stiff, a bit longer so he can sit on it so it doesn't bunch up around him. We tried on 12 before we found a suitable one. It took me about a year to explain to the salesman that the trousers had to be slightly longer, as he sits down all day, therefore come up short, (he hates his socks showing).

The bag needs to be bigger and sit right on the wheelchair handles, he has to fit so much stuff in, his shoes need to be easy to take off and on so that his toileting care wont take longer than necessary.

I'll have to make a big pad delivery out of school hours so that he has all he needs and his school friends don't see and tease about 'nappies.'

I need to pick up the months menu to make sure he's eating what is manageable for him.

Of course, Deion wont have the option of taking the shortest route to each class as he has to go the accessible way, or via the elevator. We have to pick up his lift key

We have met the 4 people who will be responsible for all of Deion's personal care and toileting needs. We have met his one to one classroom assistant

The school have ordered the height adjustable tables for his wheelchair to sit under, re arranged every class so Deion can manoeuvre, ordered the hoists, changing beds, cabinets e.t.c

We even have the whole school to ourselves the day before everyone else starts so Deion and all the workers involved can get used to each other.

Then theres Jordan and Robyn's preparation

We walked into the school outfitters, said 'we'll have that, that, that and two of them and left!

All better

2009-08-25T09:44:00.000+01:00

Thank you for all Your get well wishes and e-mails, Deion is now fully recovered from his operation. He still managed a smile for me bless him, he's made of strong stuff this one!!!

From This...

To This...

To This...

A Favourite Memory

2009-08-24T09:34:00.000+01:00

As it is nearing the end of the summer holidays, and we didn't get away this year what with all Deions illnesses!!! I thought I'd post one of my favourite holiday memories, we were in Orlando, just chilling in the pool, it was a hundred degrees out, we spent the whole day playing, just getting out of the pool for ice cream every now and then!

It was July 2005 and the last time Aaron was out in Florida with us, all the more reason to treasure the precious memories.

If you want to see our adapted Villa, or know anyone who would benefit from a stay there, go to http://www.yourdreamvillas.com/ or http://www.heavensspecialchild.co.uk/

Friends

2009-08-23T08:51:00.000+01:00

A friend will always find time for you in his diary.

A true friend does not need to consult his diary first.

Great Quote!

2009-08-22T08:50:00.001+01:00

Always do right.

This will gratify some people

And astonish the rest.

Mark Twain

lat of the swine flu jokes

2009-08-21T08:51:00.000+01:00

Okay, I promise, these are the last swine flu jokes, a collection of the best ones that people forwarded to Deion via e-mail and face book. I thought you might like them, they made him squeal with laughter (sorry, couldn't resist)

I called the Swine Flu hotline - all I got was crackling

The doctor asked me how long I'd had the symptoms of Swine Flu.
I said it must have been about a Weeeeeeeeeeeeeek!

Apparently my mate's got Swine Flu - I think he's just telling porkies!

The only known cure for Swine Flu in humans has been found to be the liberal application of oinkment.

IF YOU GET AN EMAIL ABOUT SWINE FLU DELETE IT AS ITS ONLY
SPAM.

Swine flu however, is not a problem for the pigs because
they're all going to be cured anyway!

News Flash .... This just in. The world's religious leaders have issued a joint declaration that the Swine Flu pandemic is the start of the
aporkalypse.

Swine flu has now mixed with bird flu.
Scientists say they will find a cure when pigs fly.

I just heard on the news that "Swine Flu could potentially be a threat to every single person in the world". Well it's a good thing I'm married then, isn't it?

This is not a time for panic. It is no pig deal.

It is a mild hamdemic,don't believe the spam you're getting.

The real prayer at the dinner table

2009-08-20T10:12:00.000+01:00

Okay, so we had guests for dinner, guests I didn't want but all the same, there they were, all sitting at the dining table, waiting to criticize me.

My husband said grace, blessed the food gave thanks for the company...

All the while I said my own grace...it was more along the lines of,

Please God let me get through this meal without stabbing ------- in the eye with my fork, let me put up with -------'s talk of all bodily functions without vomiting in my food, and please, please God if ------ moans about my parenting/housekeeping/cooking skills once more, then please strike her down with a lightening bolt (try to miss my favourite serving dish if you can).... failing that, just kill me now.

Luckily my guests all had their heads bowed in prayer, and Deion was the only one who noticed I was making stabbing motions in my chest with the knife.